Tag Archives: Falkirk

english, Ordinary, Scones

Roasted Bean Café

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Triangles and all that

Okay, okay, the Crystal Palace Triangle is not so much a ‘scone desert’ as we first thought. We found another one! picture of garden area of Roasted Bean café in Crystal PalaceThis time it’s at the Roasted Bean café. Like the LWS café in our previous post, it is situated on the outer extremity of the Triangle where the influence is weakest. The Roasted Bean Café had plain and fruit scones. Some sort of normality after our gruyère and chive experience.

Normality at the Roasted Bean Cafe

Normality, however, is sometimes not all that it is cracked up to be. The girl who brought our fruit scone, semi-apologetically explained that the scraping of jam on offer was all they had left. Not a great start. On the plus side, we were able to sit outside in the ‘garden’ on what was a very hot day. picture of a Roasted Bean café sconeThe scone itself, although nicely toasted and tasted okay, the meagre jam and the strange synthetic butter missed the topscone marker by quite a long way. We have concluded that the Crystal Palace Triangle, though not a complete scone desert, is not the sort of place that sconeys should be frequenting. Unless, of course, they have a peripheral interest in broadcasting??

The BBC and Scotland

Picture of the Crystal Palace TV transmitter

Crystal Palace may not cut the mustard for scones but it does have the famous Crystal Palace TV transmitter. With a coverage of more than 12 million people, it is the most important in the UK . Broadcasting aficionados will know that the first ever TV broadcast took place in our own home town of Falkirk. John Logie Baird demonstrated the new fandangled thing in what is now Johnston’s bistro in the Lint Riggs.
 
You are probably also aware that the whole ‘TV thingy’ caught on in quite a big way when the BBC was formed. The rest, as they say, is history. The BBC is about to get it’s new charter and whereas this transmitter probably does a good job for London it remains to be seen whether the BBC can adapt to the new politics of the UK. Can it reflect a Scotland where all but three MPs support independence? So far it has failed miserably. For instance, reporting a big independence rally in Catalonia whilst completely ignoring a similar rally in Glasgow on the same day. That is not a service, it is a disservice.

With Scotland raising more than £300m in BBC licence fees and only getting £83m back, an urgent revision is required. RTE, the Irish broadcaster, buys all BBC channels for £21m a year. It doesn’t need a brain surgeon to work it out. An independent Scotland would be much better off simply paying for the BBC in the same way as RTE. If it wants to.

Do you think this transmitter could have anything to do with the mysterious lack of scones in the Crystal Palace Triangle?

SE19 3RY     tel: 07515 126190     Roasted Bean FB

Scones, Top

Boclair House Hotel

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After a disappointing run of ‘poor’ or ‘no-show’ baking encounters at the Brenachoile then at Coffee on Wooer, we felt we had to do something to lift the air of despondency on planet scone. What better, to turn our fortunes around, than a visit to the offices of East Dunbartonshire Council. That’s what it was until it was recently transformed into the Boclair House Hotel. the terrace at Boclair House HotelThe red sandstone mansion was built in 1890 by the three sisters, Misses Buchanan, Margaret, Jane and Elizabeth. It was originallly known as the Buchanan Retreat for the exclusive use of the less well off members of the Buchanan clan.

Nowadays, it is definitely for the more well to do Buchanans .. and everybody else of course! So called because it sits on Boclair hill, it was a very familiar architectural sight for Pat and I, in our courting days, when we used to whiz to and fro on the back road between Falkirk and Drumchapel.

We can do swank!

After all these years we were fascinated to, at long last, see inside. Here with one of Pat’s aunts, afternoon tea was what we were aiming for and the rather sumptuous surrounds in Annabel’s Bar, scene of the action, only served to heighten our expectations even further. Surely we wouldn’t get a duff scone here? Interior of Annabel's bar at Boclair House Hotel

Of course, we had to have a glass of champs to kick things off because if you are going to do swank then you have to do it properly. We can do swank with the best of them! afternoon teaNormally on such occasions the scones appear on the lower or middle tier of the cake stand. This time however they arrived majestically, in pride of place. Elevated above the sandwiches and cakes. It all looked scrummy … and it was! The scones were warm and slightly crunchy on the outside with a delightful soft interior. Together with the jam and cream … topscone, no doubt!

Trump and Farage

If you have ever harboured any lingering doubts about Nigel Farage maybe being one of the good guys, though we cannot imagine why you would, his recent appearance as one of Trump’s henchmen must surely clinch it for you. He’s an idiot! Probably a much richer idiot than he was before the event … but still an idiot! Having fled from the Brexit battlefield he now turns up in the US. Can we stop him returning to the UK? Apparently his wife is a foreigner so under our new regime that should be grounds enough?

G61 2TQ     tel: 0141 942 4278      Boclair House Hotel

Scones, Uncategorized

Coffee on Wooer

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Goodness knows, we really try to point out the positives whenever we can. It has been very difficult recently however. Like our last post about the Brenachoile at Trossachs Pier, some places just leave you no choice but to report it as it is. This is another. We were strolling idly through Falkirk, as we do, and when we came on this place we were intrigued. Situated on Wooer Street (a derivation of ‘weaver street’) it wasn’t too hard to see how they came up with the name. street sign for Wooer Street, Falkirk

These premises have undergone many incarnations over the years and this was obviously the latest. When we went in we stood and waited because we weren’t sure what to do. There were about four young lads doing headless chicken impersonations but none of them paid us any attention.

How not to sell a scone

Eventually we managed to capture one and asked if it was table service or self service. No answer to the question, just “what do you want”. The answer was “two coffees” at which point our attendant fled. We didn’t know if they did scones or not. Pat sat at a table and I went over to the counter where, voila, there were some scones. I jokingly asked the young chap if he had baked them that morning? He lifted one, felt it, grimaced, then unsuccessfully tried to penetrate  it with a fork. At this point he said “I wouldn’t if I was you”! So we didn’t. This is the first post we have ever put up without a picture of a scone, apart from the famous Buckhaven scone. We felt duty bound to report anyway. A piece of carrot cake was substituted and it was rather nice; the coffee was good as well, if a little bitter near the end. It’s a tremendous shame because these lads were all trying very hard but obviously lacked training and direction. A bit like a rudderless ship.

section of COW menu
section of the menu but no indication of when ‘close’ was??

There were so many mixed messages amongst the jumble of stuff which only served to make the place look untidy and confused. The menus chalked up behind the counter were all over the place! We guess the overall look was supposed to be ‘shabby chic’, but it wasn’t working … just ‘shabby’.Interior of Coffee on WooerWhere was the captain of this ship? What was he/she thinking about?

Where are they now?

Much the same could be said of the politicians who took us out of the EU. Where are they now and what were they thinking about? Still, nothing to worry about as Team GB comes in second only in the medals table to the USA … 67 in all. We are now officially a ‘sporting superpower’, whatever that means?

Not all countries have money to burn like the UK so at a cost to the taxpayer of over £4m per medal that could easily be seen as cheating. Nothing against the individual athletes, they are just ‘doing what they want to do’, good luck to them. Now, however, as well as paying for their medals, we are doubtless going to shower them with honours too. For just ‘doing what they want to do’! Promise that’s the last rant about the Olympics. According to the Coffee on Wooer’s rather glitzy but equally confusing website, they are setting out to challenge the big high street coffee shops. Maybe so, but they still have a huge amount to learn from them! Falkirk needs businesses like this so let’s hope they get it right eventually.

FK1 1NJ      tel: 01324 278026      Coffee on Wooer

Ordinary, Scones

Findlays

Back in at home after our all too brief sojourn up north. The weather has come out in sympathy with our mood, it’s a bleak kind of day. After attending to some business in the town centre we ended up here at Findlays, hoping to have our spirits raised. The rather impressive old Victorian building was built in 1893 as Falkirk’s main Post Office but since then it has undergone a variety of uses leading up to it’s current incarnation as the Falkirk Business Hub, a place which provides a home to over 30 businesses and employs around 150 people. Findlays 03Findlays is the café for the FBH but is open to everyone.

It’s pleasant enough. If it was just providing canteen facilities to the FBH, it would be doing a great job. However it has ambitions and promotes itself as ‘the home of great food and coffee’  .. but it just isn’t. It looks and feels like part of the Hub and lacks that coffee shop vibe. These days we expect wifi everywhere we go. Here the password is helpfully provided on the menu .. but it doesn’t work. The correct password (the one with the capital letter at the start) is on a wall blackboard … annoying. Doubly annoying to have people cleaning windows and going around with feather dusters while you are trying to eat your scone!  Findlays 02So far, so not so good … the mood was not lifting!

Here you might hope that the scones would ride to the rescue with a glowing report and everyone would live happily ever after … but no. It was a case of style over substance. Presentation is a wonderful thing, it delights the eye and heightens expectations. These expectations however have to be fulfilled and sadly this was not the case here. They were disappointingly pasty and heavy. Could the mood get any blacker? Well, yes, just look at the news.

Advice on Brexit

It turns out that Scottish Labour’s PFI scandal has taken a turn for the worse. Not only are our schools and hospitals crumbling, we don’t even know who owns them. The ownership of many being held in overseas tax havens. No one seems too sure who owns British Home Stores either as it descends into receivership. This is the super-duper modern business world we live in! Good though, that Barak Obama managed to stop by to wish the Queen a happy birthday and offer his advice on Brexit. Having advised on the Scottish referendum, he presumable felt he had to do the same for the EU one. Findlays 04Obama is probably the best US President there has been for a long long time. We need not kid ourselves, however, that it is all being done with some sort of ‘special relationship’ benevolence. The US only cares about one thing .. the US!

Looking to the multinationals

Findlays is not doing anything particularly wrong but, based on our visit, it is not doing anything particularly right either. The website is a waste of time. Once again it is a case of taking a long hard look at the multinationals like Costa and Café Nero and figuring out how they always get it so right. We wish them luck. Let’s hope we will be in a better mood by the next post.

FK1 1LL            tel: 01324 614062               Findlays Business Hub

Scones, self-service

The Restaurant FVRH

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We would not suggest that you actually come here just for a scone, heaven forbid. However, if you have to come here for whatever reason then it might be worth knowing if the scones are worth a try. Forth Valley Royal Hospital was opened in 2010 in Larbert as a replacement for both Falkirk and Stirling Royal Infirmaries. It covers a geographical area stretching from Tyndrum in the NW to Bo’ness in the SE and serves a population of 300,000. It’s very much a state-of-the-art facility with much of the work being done by robots. If you need an operation, however, it will still be carried out by highly intelligent human beings. Phew!

Therapies

Amongst the wide variety of therapies available is retail therapy. Marks & Spencer, WH Smith, Starbucks, StockShop are all present and ready to remedy your shopping cravings. Interior view of The Restaurant at Forth Valley Royal HospitalWe were just here visiting, and having some time to spare, we ended up here in what is imaginatively called ‘The Restaurant’. It has received a Healthy Living Award so we wondered what form a healthy scone would take? At the self service counter there is plenty of variety on offer. We by-passed all the healthy stuff and went straight for a scone. It has to be said it did not look any different from any other. A scone at the Restaurant in Forth valley Royal HospitalIt didn’t taste much different either, but it was perfectly acceptable. Nothing more or less than what you would expect in a place like this.

Running the NHS

Fortunately NHS Scotland seems able to cope much better than NHS England with the financial stresses and strains of running a modern Health Service. There is no mention in the media but one half of the UK is getting on just fine with it’s junior doctors. The other half however is driving their doctors to take full strike action without even emergency cover. It has to say something about the governance of the ‘United’ Kingdom. Let’s hope  the threatened strike by doctors south of the border gets resolved without mishap. We hope that none of you ever have to come here. As hospitals go, however, Forth Valley Royal Hospital is up there with the best in the world. The scones aren’t too shabby either but probably not any healthier than any other.

FK5 4WR    tel: 01324 566000    Forth Valley Royal Hospital

Ordinary

Acoustic Café

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“Sounds like great coffee” … that’s the strap line for this latest addition to the Falkirk café scene, the Acoustic Café. Not sure what great coffee sounds like? Maybe it’s the deafening sound of their own coffee machine, it really is the loudest. However, we feel it probably indicates a bit of confused thinking around the concept of selling coffee and guitars together in the one place. Acoustic 07

So, is the Acoustic Cafe a coffee shop that sells guitars or a guitar shop that sells coffee, we’re not sure. It does not seem to do either particularly well … kind of falls between two stools, so to speak. As a guitar shop it has a good range of very nice guitars. All well and good you might think. We suspect, however, that more attention has been paid to this aspect of the business than the cafe side … and if anything it should be the other way round.

New startup

Some fundamentals are just not there; the coffee may sound great but what about the taste? It is not up to the standard of it’s near competitors. The staff are not trained to the same standard as it’s near competitors. The sole member of staff on two of our visits was unsure of just about everything. Worst of all, of course, the scones are decidedly average.Acoustic 06 Not home baked, a bit dry and powdery … nowhere near a topscone. On the up-side it has a nice funky interior which differentiates it from the rest and offers loads of potential. Also, it has only been in existence for a couple of months so maybe we should cut it some slack. If it can concentrate more on the cafe side of things we hope it goes on to make sweet music and  much better coffee and scones for many years to come.

More broken promises

Music to the ears! That’s what we call the Scottish Government’s stance in the negotiations with the U.K. government over settlement of the new fiscal framework for Scotland. Instead of giving the ‘sweeping new powers’ promised after the referendum, new powers will now have to be paid for through reduced funding. Not even vaguely in the spirit of the Smith Commission. Thank goodness for the SNP. If it had been up to a Labour led administration they would have undoubtedly rolled over to their London masters long ago. Scotland would be much worse off as a result.

Luthiers

To end on a high note, the Acoustic Café did manage to introduce a new word to our lexicon .. luthier; someone who makes or repairs stringed instruments, a service available through the cafe.Acoustic 04

FK2 7AS            tel: 01324 638297      Acoustic Cafe FB

Ordinary, Scones

Tea Jennys

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This is a lovely little cafe tucked away in Kings Court, just off the High Street in Falkirk. Originally called Kings Arms Court, any hostelry of that name has long since vanished into the mists of time. It is great to see establishments like Tea Jennys thriving in spite of the tax avoiding multinationals like Starbucks, Costa and Caffé Nero snapping up all the prime sites in town.  Of course, as we reported in an earlier post some places could do with taking a leaf out of the multinationals book. Because, aside from the tax stuff which isn’t really their fault, they really do know their business. You get the feeling though that Tea Jennys, has probably looked closely at what the multinationals are doing, noted it, then decided to take an alternative approach. It does everything the big boys do but just does it differently.

tea and tea cosies at Tea Jennies, falkirk
tea and tea cosies

 

The meals, cakes and scones are home made for a start, all excellent, but it is the other little touches that set it apart. The home-knitted tea cosys, a different one for each teapot. There was a santa hat and a christmas pudding on ours. No tea bags here either, the tea is proper leaf tea served in proper tea pots, in proper tea cups with a proper tea strainer. The decor is a bit chintzy .. but different. Certainly not like any multinational that we have visited. The service is warm and friendly. Unfortunately when we visited they only had cheese scones left. Equally unfortunately they forgot about the scones in our order.

Prospering

A gentle reminder, however, brought profuse apologies .. and our scones, nicely toasted. scones at Tea Jennys, FalkirkNot topscones but very good, we may have to come back earlier in the day to catch a plain or a fruit scone. Something to look forward to next year. It’s not as if Tea Jennys is simply holding its own against the multinational competition it appears to be thriving. They recently opened a deli and an additional cafe further along the street. Long may they continue to prosper. Internal view of Tea Jennys, Falkirk

Here’s to 2016

This is probably our last scone of 2015. It only leaves us to wish all our readers a very merry Christmas and a Happy New Year. And thank you for all the support and enthusiasm throughout the year. Here’s to 2016, may all your scones be topscones.

FK1 1PG               tel: 01324 228185             Tea Jennys TA

Ordinary, Scones

Grange Manor Hotel

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The government’s announcement that it is to take in 20,000 Syrian refugee children over the next five years (on 5yr visas  after which they will have to go somewhere else) raises the question. How proud are you to be British? ‘Not very’ or ‘not at all’? There are no other options. Their attempt to show this as Britain at its most compassionate by comparing it to the Kindertransport in 1938 conveniently leaves aside the fact that the Kindertransport itself was a pretty taudry episode in British history. It was only brought about by the government of the day being sufficiently embarrassed by images of Kristallnacht. The parallels with today’s situation and the pictures of little Alan Kurdis are obvious.

At the same time the German government announces that they will take half a million every year for as long as it takes. The Germans are not more compassionate, but they have a solid economy which actually needs these people. We, on the other hand, have an economy based almost exclusively on a square mile in the centre of London. It cannot even provide quality jobs for its own citizens .. arrgghh. It’s enough to drive you to afternoon tea.

Value for money?

The Grange Manor is an old well established hotel at Earlsgate, between Falkirk and Grangemouth. It has seen many changes in its surroundings over the years and nowadays it has the misfortune to have an Asda super-warehouse across the road and an empty car showroom next door. On the plus side it must be the nearest hotel to the Kelpies and that probably generates some tourist business. We were using an £11 voucher for afternoon tea for two so it was going to be difficult to go badly wrong.Grange Manor 02 It didn’t go far wrong but even if it is cheap you still want it to be good. Everything was fine except the scones which tasted like they had been made the day before. Or maybe even the day before that! Service was so scant you had to go looking for it.

It is tempting to ask what you would expect for that sort of money but unfortunately the answer would be  … exactly what we got! Unfortunately it seemed to be priced about right with the voucher. Thank goodness for the voucher. The Grange Manor, like the government, has got to try harder.

FK3 8XJ          tel: 01324 474836        Grange Manor

topweird

Mother Murphy’s 2

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We said that if we ever figured out the treacle scone days at Mother Murphy’s Tearoom, you would be the first to hear. We are nothing if not true to our word. You will remember from the first blog, the reason treacle scone days are important is because on these days you can get a ‘thunder and lightning’ scone? You will also remember that there was something of a tricky problem. It was impossible to tell when these days would occur. It seemed to depend on some sort of divine intervention. Of course, there is no foretelling that sort of thing. However, this is Mother Murphy’s 2.

Picture worth a thousand words

Well, let me tell you about one of the perks of being scone bloggers, you sometimes get inside information. Call it divine intervention if you wish! Pat has just told me that it is the only perk. I stand corrected. Anyway, this morning on FaceBook, we got a wee message, “today is a treacle scone day!”. Mother Murphy 07And so it was that we ended up in this little tearoom for the second time in a week with a somewhat heightened sense of anticipation. After a short wait (sure they did it just to get our juices flowing) it duly appeared. There is little point in me describing a ‘thunder and lightning’ scone .. hopefully the picture says it all.

Scoffing kit

A veritable extravaganza of treacle, cream and icing sugar. Scoffing could get a bit messy if it was not for the fact that it comes complete with a dedicated ‘thunder and lightning’ scone scoffing kit – a knife and fork. The top picture hopefully describes adequately how good it was .. divine even!

The other day, in Aberfeldy, we had a ‘cheese and bacon‘ scone which was also delicious so perhaps we need to introduce a new ‘weird scone’ category. This one definitely qualifies. Ordinary mortals, however, will just have to figure out for themselves which are treacle scone days .. good luck!

FK2 9AU     tel: 07951 843512      Mother Murphy’s

Scones, Top

Mother Murphy’s Tearoom

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We know that loads of you have been wondering whatever happened to Jim Murphy. Wonder no more he is alive and well and working in this tearoom in Falkirk. Okay, okay, it’s not that Jim Murphy. This Jim Murphy owns the place with his wife Debra and this one has much more honesty and vision. The vision to make this little tearoom a roaring success. Mother Murphy 01Only open a couple of months, it is still early days but all the signs are good. Clean, tidy, homely, home-produced food. Gleneagles it is not, but it is not trying to be anything other than what it is .. a great wee tearoom. Located at Ladysmill on the main road between Falkirk and Grangemouth we were lucky enough to be able to park right outside the door. Once inside we had the choice of Debra’s home-baked blueberry or plain scones … dilemma!

The Murphy blueberry
The Murphy blueberry
The Murphy plain
The Murphy plain

Unable to make such a momentous decision, we had one of each. Pat’s plain scone was accompanied by strawberry jam and my blueberry one with bramble and apple jam. Both jams handcrafted by Jim .. there is no end to this duo’s talent!  There was one major problem however … the ‘thunder and lightning’ scone on the menu is only available on treacle scone days. Would they tell us what days were treacle scone days? No! Apparently it is an inspirational, spontaneous sort of thing that happens very unpredictably. Presumably, we will just have to keep going back time and time again.

Chilcot

Talking of time .. do you know what comes next in this time measurement scale .. decade, century, millennium, aeon, ??? Yes, you guessed it… it’s a Chilcot. The best thing about Mother Murphy’s Tearoom is Jim and Debra. They are very friendly and seem really enthusiastic and genuinely happy with what they are doing .. and so they should be! We wish them every success and one day .. one day, we might get to sample that elusive thunder and lighting scone. If we do, you will be the first to hear about it. In the meantime, we think all that talent and ingenuity deserves a topscone award. So it is like Gleneagles after all!

FK2 9AU     tel: 07951 843512      Mother Murphy’s