Tag Archives: edinburgh

Ordinary, Scones

The Bay Hotel

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What a guy, what a hero, what a romantic! He had just seen off the Vikings at the Battle of Largs. Now, here he was riding from Edinburgh to Kinghorn on a dark stormy night to be with his wife on her birthday the following day. The Milk Tray Man would have been proud.

King Alexander III monument near the Bay Hotel at Pettycur Bay
The Alexander III monument near Kinghorn where he died on 18 March 1286
Birthday celebrations

It was not to be, however. His horse fell and he was found dead on the shore the following morning. Alexander III, the last Celtic King of Scots had been advised that the ride from Edinburgh was too dangerous. But would he listen? All Alexander’s three children died young so he left no heirs. The period of instability that followed would eventually lead to war with England. Oh no, not again! When Alexander died Queen Yolande was left waiting in Kinghorn having a memorable birthday for all the wrong reasons. Out of respect for her husband she would not have been sampling scones here at the Bay Hotel. We were however! Not out of disrespect you understand, just plain necessity!The terrace at the Bay Hotel at Pettycur Bay

Cream teas

After an exhilarating walk through the rocks and along the sand dodging plummeting witches (more of that later), we were in need of refreshment. A scone at the Bay Hotel at Pettycur BayWe had spotted the Bay Hotel from the beach so we made our way there. It’s a strange kind of place. Probably set up to  cater for the huge caravan park that surrounds it. It has a leisure centre with a beautiful swimming pool but we were only looking for one thing … and it wasn’t a swim.

A fruit scone was no problem but when we inquired about cream they asked if we would prefer a cream tea . A cream tea it was. The terrace looking over the river towards Edinburgh on the far shore was very tempting. However, lovely day as it was, still the middle of January so we opted for inside. Interior view of the Bay Hotel at Pettycur BayThe restaurant was obviously designed to cater for a multitude rather than just us and one or two others. A little bit soulless. Although not a topscone we thoroughly enjoyed it. We should have sat outside though … the Vikings would have!

Suffice to say that we had a much more enjoyable day in Kinghorn than Queen Yolande.

New profession

We came to Kinghorn for a walk along the beach at Pettycur. It’s all rather beautiful, especially on a day like today. However, we were not that far from the Clock Tower Café in Pittenweem where attentive readers will remember the fate of poor Janet Cornfoot. Yes, this is that part of Scotland where, at one time,  all women must have lived in fear of their lives. Hard to imagine that this little town gave rise to a brand new profession  … witch-pricking! The holders of these witch-pricking jobs, usually the local clergy, were responsible for inserting long wires into alleged witches in search of pain sensitivity and the presence of blood?? They were also responsible for interpreting the results. Let’s hazard a guess. If they found no blood and no sensitivity to pain, that would indeed have been a witch. Probably didn’t work like that though.
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View towards Edinburgh from the Bay Hotel at Pettycur Bay
Vie from the Bay … Arthur’s Seat in the middle distance

Kinghorn was a centre for witchcraft trials so most of the skilled witch-prickers were based there. As we walked along the beach we could look up at the ring inserted in the cliff face to which witches were chained and burned. If leniency was being shown they were only half burned before being thrown to their deaths while still chained to the ring. The sudden stop snapped them in half.

The logo of the Bay Hotel at Pettycur BayMany of these witches were accused of meeting with the Devil and, in most of those allegations, the Devil was disguised as a man. Goodness, surely not? Anyway, in 1644, Katherine Wallenge was the last poor woman to be treated in this vile manner.  Consequently, all witch-prickers became redundant. Except? No it couldn’t be! We wonder if a modern form of witch-pricking has been resurrected in Westminster.

Return of the witch-prickers

Theresa May must feel a bit like Katherine Wallenge with all her colleagues sticking it to her. However, when it comes to Brexit, Theresa’s mantra that only her deal can deliver the Brexit that ‘the people’ voted for overlooks one vital fact. The people didn’t vote for some highfalutin deal with the satanic EU. Based on the garbage they had been fed by the politicians and media they just wanted OUT… simple! So unless she delivers a hard Brexit she will have failed to deliver what ‘the people’ voted for. “Stop all this silly bickering and get on with it” is what they would say. Of course it would result in the biggest act of self-harm in recorded history. Not exactly sure how they would measure it but we can almost see the Guinness Book of Records folk gathering surreptitiously in the background.

KY3 9YE      tel: 01592 892222          The Bay

Telephone news

You’ll never guess what we found round the back of the Bay Hotel. Please don’t ask why we were round there. Yes, you’re right, a K8 telephone box. The K7, like the K5 never made it into production so the K6 which we all know and love was followed, in 1968, by the K8. Made entirely of cast iron, about 11,000 were produced. Now there are only 54 registered as still in existence. Wonder if this one is registered? It was in bad shape but was still proudly wearing the Lion Foundry badge. Okay, okay, we really do need to get a life. K8 telephone box to the rear of the Bay Hotel at Pettycur BayWhile we are on the subject The Pedant has kindly sent a photo of a fully functioning K6 in Stow-on-the-Wold. Made in Falkirk … yeagh, quality!K6 telephone box in Stow in the Wold

Ordinary, Scones

The Scotsman Grand Café

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We had popped in here, to what used to be the offices of the Scotsman newspaper, on a previous occasion. Impressed with the gracious surroundings and the helpfulness of the staff we vowed to visit again. The Grand Café is their restaurant area and they do a mini afternoon tea for mini people and it just so happened that today we had such a mini person accompanying us. So after phoning to book two cream teas and a mini afternoon tea we jumped on the train to Edinburgh full of excited anticipation. When we arrived they checked our booking and read it back to us … excellent! What could go wrong? Internal view of the Grand Café, Scotsman Hotel, Edinburgh

Where are the cream teas?

Then a waiter arrived at our table to find out what we wanted?? We repeated our order then he asked if we would like a gin drink or champagne with it. Unexpected but because we were in a happy mood we thought we would have the champagne. It arrived fairly promptly and then we waited .. and waited …… and waited. After watching people who came in well after us tucking into large lunches we had to ask what had happened to ours and were assured that it was being prepared. Eh, it’s a couple of scones and some jam!! Anyway, eventually they came with a mini afternoon tea and afternoon tea for two?? What happened to our cream teas?

Waiting area at the toilets at the Grand Café, Scotsman Hotel, Edinburgh
Waiting area at the toilets
Sounds of gun fire

The boss lady was summoned and she said that we had champagne so we had to have afternoon tea … arrgghh! We told her that we had given the same order umpteen times and that the waiter had then asked us if we wanted champagne. To which we gave the obvious if somewhat predictable answer. Obviously something had been lost in the eastern european translation. A scone at the Grand Café, Scotsman Hotel, EdinburghThe afternoon teas, which had taken so long to prepare, were whisked away and replaced, shortly thereafter, by our two cream teas accompanied with profuse apologies. We thought we heard the slightly muffled sound of a waiter being shot but luckily he soon reappeared.

More please

All this was extremely disappointing because we had had high hopes for this place and the prolonged wait would have seemed even longer had we not had a mini person to amuse us. There was a plain and a fruit scone with each cream tea and they were quite big which meant that there was only enough jam for one … we had to ask for more. To make matters even worse the scones were delicious … what a dilemma! If it hadn’t been for the veritable catalogue of mistakes they would easily have merited a topscone but sadly not on this occasion.

To top it all off, when the bill arrived, although they had kindly given us a substantial discount they still got it wrong, they had overcharged! Logo of the Grand Café, Scotsman Hotel, EdinburghIf this all this sounds like a complete disaster, it wasn’t … we did in fact have a very enjoyable afternoon but that was largely due to a five year old’s funny observations. The Grand Café is a beautiful place with its marbled halls and chandeliers. They certainly knew how to build newspaper offices back in 1905 when the Scotsman produced its first edition. Apparently we were sitting in what used to be the editorial section.

Left hand, right hand

As social media takes over from traditional print the newspaper industry everywhere is seeing plummeting circulation figures and the Scotsman is no exception. It is currently up for sale. The only newspaper with expanding circulation in Scotland is the National, the only one that supports independence. Anyway, we’re sure that we just had an unlucky experience at the Grand Café. The left hand simply didn’t seem to know what the right hand was doing. A bit like the Conservative party’s handling of Brexit.External view of the Grand Café, Scotsman Hotel, EdinburghEH1 1TR          tel: 0131 622 2999        Grand Café

ps our Middle East correspondent has sent in a report from Ireland. We know it’s not in the middle east but he gets around. This time he has unearthed an albino K6 in County Wicklow in Eire.

K6 telephone box outside Jonny Fox's piub in County Wicklow, Eire
Johnny Fox’s pub … K6 on far right

K6 telephone box outside Jonny Fox's piub in County Wicklow, Eire

Made in Kirkintilloch, the fact that it is outside Johnny Fox’s pub, world famous for its Hooley Night is entirely coincidental.

Ordinary, Scones

Scottish Storytelling Centre

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The few readers who actually pay any attention to these blog posts will be very aware that the person we would most like to invite to one of our dinner parties would be the ‘Master of Life’, Robert Bontine Cunninghame Graham. Indeed, four of our previous posts have come about as a direct result of Graham’s stories: Stuarts of Buckhaven, Liz MacGregor’s Coffee Shop, Brodies of Moffat and The Gallery Café.

Friedrich Engels, Oscar Wilde and Buffalo Bill were among his many friends. One of the finest authors in the English language, Joseph Conrad (who could never be described as having led a dull life) commented on Graham “when I think of you I feel as tho’ I have lived all my life in a dark hole“. Graham died in 1936 but in Argentina he is still regarded as a national hero, affectionately known as Don Roberto. In Scotland, being directly related to King Robert II, he had the best claim to become King of Scotland. Perhaps it is appropriate that we end up here, in the Scottish Storytelling Centre, to hear stories about him.

Important scones

The Cunninghame Graham Society, which is dedicated to promoting his memory, had organised a talk about the great man. Okay, okay, we hear you cry, “but did he like scones?” In all the literature written about Graham we have not come across any reference to scones. However he was a man of exceptionally high intellect and good taste so he would undoubtedly have placed great importance on them.

We had never heard of the Storytelling Centre but when they said it was part of John Knox’s house  on the Royal Mile (the white building centre stage in the title photo) we knew exactly where it was. And what a fantastic place it is. A modern complex of exhibition and performance areas dedicated to the art of storytelling and … a café!

What better way to spend our time waiting for the talk to begin than having a scone. A scone at the Scottish Storytelling Centre, EdinburghObviously, trying to get a completely fresh scone at seven in the evening is a bit of a tall order however the one we were sharing was not at all bad. Plenty of  fruit and quite light in texture. It came with a pot of jam and, the bane of our lives, a pack of Rhodda’s Cornish clotted cream. Perfectly good cream but all the way from Cornwall to this bastion of Scottishness?? Anyway, although it was nowhere near a topscone, we thoroughly enjoyed what we had and would certainly return.

Argentine tango

Although he was in the House of Commons for six years, Cunninghame Graham hated all politicians. He was often asked to withdraw from the House due to his unparliamentary behaviour.Interior view of the Scottish Storytelling Centre, Edinburgh Goodness knows what he would make of today’s unprincipled and spineless inhabitants of the Palace of Westminster. He would be  enraged that the poverty he fought against so vigorously at Westminster in the 1890s still exists. The necessity of food banks, even for those in work. He would have been heartened, however, that progress has been made towards an independent Scotland. However mystified by the time it is taking. His own stories, whether they be about a couple dancing an Argentine tango in Beunos Aires or a dismal funeral in Scotland, remain as vivid as this large picture hanging in the Centre … ‘A Mile Of Stories’ by Julie Lacome.

A Mile Of Stories by Julie Lacome at the Scottish Storytelling Centre,
Part of an effort to revive the Old Town as a living community. “Heave awa, we’re no deid yet”.

EH1 1SR.     tel: 0131 556 9579       Scottish Storytelling Centre

Scones, self-service, Top

Café Zest – Jenners

Jenners department store is a kind of Scottish ‘Harrods’. In fact until last week it was owned by House of Fraser which, at o

by Royal appointment coat of arms, Jenners Edinburgh
by Royal appointment – but the latin “no one provokes me with impunity” is a tad confrontational

ne time, also owned Harrods. According to the  large crest on the wall it’s where the Queen shops when she’s in town? This establishment has been gracing Edinburgh’s Princes Street for 180 years now and has survived many traumas along the way.

Takeover

Today, however, it is under threat like never before with the House of Fraser being brought out of administration by Mike Ashley, of Sports Direct fame. Or infamy? The price for 31 stores, a measly £90m. True to form Ashley has not taken on any of the debts or pension responsibilities. It remains to be seen what will happen to the stores of which this is only one. Ashley’s reputation for cutting  costs and playing fast and lose with conditions of employment does not bode well.

Hence we felt that, if we were ever to have a scone in Jenners, perhaps we should do it sooner rather than later. Of course we blame Margaret Thatcher. Then again we blame Margaret Thatcher for everything. She managed to make avarice respectable and created today’s environment where it is okay for unabashed corporate greed to masquerade as ‘good business’. No one else, however, seemed willing to take House of Fraser on so perhaps we do Mr Ashley an injustice. Let’s hope he can at least save some of the stores and jobs. Enough trivia, what about the scones? Sign for Café Zest, Jenners in Edinburgh

Gourmet scones

There are several cafés and restaurants in the store but for some reason we found ourselves in Café Zest on the 5th floor. Probably because the lift took us there. The space is slightly odd. It has comfortable armchairs at one end and slightly utilitarian chairs forming the main body of the café. Internal view of Café Zest, Jenners in EdinburghNeedless to say there was hardly anyone sitting on these so everyone was squeezed in at one end … on the comfy chairs! Why do they not simply provide armchairs everywhere? They are self evidently what folk prefer! A gourmet scone at Jenners, EdinburghThey had plain scones and fruit scones but we were excited by the prospect of the ‘gourmet scone’ as it was labeled on the self service counter. Poster for Scones at Jenners, Edinburgh
No idea what constitutes a gourmet scone but obviously we had to find out. It came with a little pot of the ubiquitous Tiptree jam and a generous bowl of whipped cream. We don’t usually award topscones to self service places since the service and presentation all form part of the overall scone experience. However, on this occasion, we felt that it should at least have a ‘top self service’ scone award. It was delicious. We still don’t know what constitutes a gourmet scone. There was certainly different kinds of fruit together with some other things, nuts perhaps, which gave it a delightfully sweet crunchiness. It was finished all too soon!

As we walked down through the floors we discovered another two restaurants on the 3rd floor. One, a sort of deli café, by the well known ‘Valvona and Crolla‘ and another one, slightly more upmarket, which was simply called ‘Jenners’.

Internal view of Jenners Restaurant, Jenners in Edinburgh
Jenners – 3rd floor resaurant
Rumanian opinions

As Jenners struggles with the inevitable advance of online shopping, problems in the retail industry are not hard to find. Indeed, we hear of another high street brand going to the wall almost every week. If, like us, you bemoan the sorry state of the High Street while simultaneously doing much of your shopping via your computer then you will also know that we have only ourselves to blame. Internal view of Jenners in EdinburghWhen we asked the Rumanian sales assistant on the second floor if she thought the store would survive she simply replied “of course it will survive”. With its illustrious 180 year history and gourmet scones, let’s hope she is right!

EH2 2YJ       tel: 0131 2602316        Café Zest

Scones, Top

Tweeddale Arms Hotel

What is it with the aristocracy?  Does having too much money and privilege simply make you bonkers, or do they have to take lessons? Maybe at places like Eton or Gordonstoun? Today we are in Gifford just a short distance outside Edinburgh. The village takes its name from the Gifford family of noblemen the first of whom was Sir Hugo Gifford, a known wizard, who in 1267 built Yester Castle. He designed the castle and an underground dungeon known as the Goblin Ha’. Built, supposedly with the help of magic and a small army of hobgoblins, the beautifully vaulted Ha’ (Hall) can still be seen beneath the ruins of the castle. Even today, the Goblin Ha’ Hotel sits proudly on the main street.

A view of Gifford main street
Gifford main street
Odd beginnings

Gifford village itself does not go back as far as that though, in fact, it didn’t even exist back then. In the 17th century. One of Sir Hugo’s ancestors who valued his privacy highly, the first Marquess of Tweeddale, built a 7 mile wall round the Yester Estate and demolished the village of Bothans (John Knox was born there in 1505) . He deemed the village to be too close to his house. See what we mean, bonkers! A redeeming factor was that he built this village over a mile away just outside the wall to house the estate workers and gave it the family name … as you do? Thus Gifford was born.

A view of Gifford
Gifford Town Hall
Fairies and scones

After a beautiful drive through the Lammermuir hills we thought that, if we were ever to get a scone in which fairies may have had a hand, the Goblin’ Ha’ Hotel was our best bet but unfortunately it wasn’t to be … no fairies and no scones. We took our leave and went round the corner to this place, the Tweeddale Arms. What a good move that turned out to be. Internal view of Tweedale Arms Hotel in GiffordWe were ushered into a lounge filled with antique furniture and pictures and we had it entirely to ourselves! This was a beautiful and very comfortable room. It would have been nice if there had been a log fire in the big granite fireplace but hey, it was a hot day, so maybe just as well. A scone at the Tweedale Arms Hotel in GiffordThe lady who was looking after us was lovely. Nothing was too much trouble.

When she brought in our scones everything was presented perfectly. Okay the jam and butter were prepacked but the supersized tub of cream more than made up for that. A very pleasant hour was spent noseying round the room and reading country life magazines in the big comfy armchairs. This is the life, nice surroundings, topscones and wonderful service!

Trump’s America

A picture at the Tweedale Arms Hotel in Gifford
Among the pictures in the room was this lovely little ceramic in a gilt frame and a photograph depicting a young lady ready for tennis … obviously in more genteel times. A picture at the Tweedale Arms Hotel in GiffordOne of Gifford’s most famous sons is John Witherspoon, a signatory to the American Declaration of Independence and first president of Princeton University. We wonder what he would make of Trump’s America? And would he have signed Scotland’s upcoming declaration of independence? We have it on good authority that Witherspoon was a very fair and eminently sensible man so we have no doubt he’d have jumped at the chance.

A picture at the Tweedale Arms Hotel in Gifford
Picture of a stag hunt at the Tweeddale

Thanks Tweeddale Arms for a great visit

EH41 4QU     tel: 01620 810240       Tweeddale Arms Hotel

ps: our Trossachs correspondents have sent in a photo of a sconeloaf?? You know as much as we do!

Sconeloaf

Ordinary, Scones

Pâtissier Maxime

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Delicate cakes at Pâtissier Maxime, EdinburghHere we are in Edinburgh again and this time Pat is treating me to afternoon tea at Pâtissier Maxime … yeagh! In 1985 when Didier Meyer won “best Puff Pastry in France” it encouraged him to set up his first Pâtissier Maxime in Haguenau near Strasbourg. He probably never dreamed that one day there would be one here in the west end of the Scottish capital, but here it is! It specialises in macaroons, cakes, tarts and loads of other pastries but they also make their own ice cream and chocolate. Their window display is a glorious confection of colour and deliciousness.  The burning question, of course was “what do the French know about afternoon tea” … it’s such a British institution. This very French establishment might struggle to pass muster?

Raised pinkies

Once seated it all started in a terribly civilised way with a glass of prosecco but when we saw the afternoon tea arriving we knew it was going to be a little bit different … in presentation at least. Normally afternoon tea comes with a fine china cake stand and equally fine china tea cups in order to engender the refined atmosphere necessary for genteel conversation. Raised pinkies and all that! Afternoon tea at Pâtissier Maxime in Edinburgh

Not in Pâtissier Maxime. Here it comes on a huge heavy multi-tiered wooden construction covered in fake grass. Tea comes in thick coffee cups … sacrebleu, mon dieu, help ma bob!! Three girls at the next table got an even bigger one that the waitress could barely carry. At least there was a nod to British sensitivity with the savoury stuff at the bottom and the sweet delicate cakes up at the top. Sheep table decoration at Pâtissier Maxime, EdinburghOnce we had recovered from the initial shock we noticed that, as well as the copious amounts of food, there were several ‘fun’ items like easter eggs, bunny rabbits … and a sheep?? The sandwiches and cakes were all absolutely delicious of course but the crème de la crème for us was always going to be the scone.

Désolé monsieur!

They were big … much bigger than they should be for an afternoon tea so we were a bit nervous about tackling them. In the end we decided to share one between the two of us. If we had eaten one each we would never have got anywhere near the goodies on the top tier. A scone at Pâtissier Maxime in EdinburghThey turned out to be quite good, a tad on the dry side perhaps but just toooo big. Fine on their own perhaps but not as part of a very generous afternoon tea. No topscone for Didier … désolé monsieur!

Everything else was excellent and the service we received was wonderful. So did Patissier Maxime pass muster? Well, yes and no! The food definitely did but the presentation, flamboyant and  fun as it was, lacked that certain British reserve. But then they are all French in here, what did we expect? Scotland is not particularly noted for reserve, quite the opposite, but these days even Scottish reserve lies head and shoulders above the British variety. Internal view of Pâtissier Maxime in Edinburgh

Stiff upper lip

Can you imagine the furore if David Cameron had had to ask the EU for permission to hold a referendum on Brexit .. and then to be told “no, you can’t”! Nicola Sturgeon’s reserve is astounding in the face of the hypocrisy of Theresa May who, up until recently, was lecturing us on what a disaster Brexit would be for all nations of the UK. Margaret Thatcher, of all people, said “Scotland does not need a referendum on independence she just needs to send a majority of nationalist MPs to Westminster to have a mandate for independence”. She obviously never envisaged that happening, far less that 56 of the 59 Scottish MPs at Westminster would end up being nationalist. In these circumstances, Sturgeon’s patience, dignity and reserve could be used as a lesson to any self-respecting Englishman in stiffupperlipness.Internal view of Pâtissier Maxime in Edinburgh

Thanks Pat for treating me at Pâtissier Maxime. You know I’m worth it!

EH2 4PA     tel: 0131 225 6066      Pâtissier Maxime

Ordinary, Scones

The Park Bistro

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In the year 1818 a man stood in a field somewhere between Edinburgh and Falkirk and drove his spade into the soil. He was starting to excavate a massive thirty one mile long ditch between the two towns which would eventually be filled with water. The Union Canal, as we know it today. Nowadays we have huge automated earth moving machines. It is quite extraordinary to think that this canal with all its tunnels and aqueducts had to be constructed entirely by hand. Millions of spadefuls mostly at the hands of hundreds of Highlanders and Irishmen.

The intention was to feed Edinburgh’s insatiable appetite for coal but today our own personal needs are much simpler because just a few yards from the canal’s towpath at Philpstoun is a converted cattle shed, the Park Bistro. We hoped it would satisfy our appetite for scones. For the many hundreds of people using the canal and the towpath The Park provides welcome respite from their exertions. Today, however, our exertions were pretty feeble since we arrived by car on our way home from Edinburgh. Interior of the Park Bistro, Linlithgow

Scooshie or whipped

Quite a while back we tried to get a scone here but they had just sold the last one so it was not to be. Today, however, there was no such problem … scones aplenty! When they arrived with our coffee we asked if there was any cream. The lady screwed her face up and said “only scooshie”. We screwed our faces up and said “no thanks”. A scone at the Park Bistro, LinlithgowHowever, just as we were about to cut into our first scone she suddenly reappeared placing a lovely bowl of whipped cream on our table … “stole it from the chef making a pavlova”! And, with a sly wink, she was off just as suddenly. Service, or what?

The coffee was good but the scones themselves were quite tricky to eat. They were so crumbly … much wiping and licking of fingers. Despite this we enjoyed our time at The Park …  but not what we would describe as a topscone experience.

War of Devolution

Ajoining the café area is a wee room imaginatively called ‘The Wee Room’, which can be hired for private parties and in it hangs a tapestry showing Louis XIV defeating the Spanish near a canal in Bruges in the 1667 War of Devolution. Can’t think why it should be hanging here other than canals … oh, and devolution. A concept which seems in mortal danger these days given the Prime Minister’s attitude to Scotland and Brexit.

a tapestry at the Park Bistro, Linlithgow
Must have taken them ages to get ready for battle!

 

It’s a bit rich, when the Parliament in Edinburgh wants independence and almost every single Scottish MP at Westminster wants independence, for May to tell Sturgeon to ignore these ‘details’ and get on with the day job. Especially when May’s own domestic politics are in a much worse state than Scotland’s. Anyway, with the announcement yesterday of IndyRef2 we cannot expect the battle over the next few years to be conducted with anything like the aplomb of Louis XIV. It is going to be messy! Window sign for the Park Bistro, Linlithgow

On a slightly different tack. These days most people would pay a premium to have a canal view but not so William Forbes of Callendar.  When the Union Canal was being built he petitioned every MP at Westminster. He thought the canal might spoil the distant view from his mansion. The route was subsequently diverted through a half mile tunnel under Prospect Hill. It had to be hewn by hand from solid rock. Not a problem in those days when men were disposable. The great and the good will always look after each other. Looking at that tapestry again you kind of get the feeling they might take a break from battle for afternoon tea … and a scone!

EH49 6QY     tel: 01506 846666       The Park

Ordinary, Scones, self-service

The Scottish Cafe

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As we walked back to Waverley station in Edinburgh we had to pass the Scottish National Gallery. You can’t miss it, it’s the large imposing Parthenon like building at the bottom of the Mound. View towards the Scottish National Gallery, EdinburghAs you have probably gathered by now, Pat and I are not exactly what you might call ‘mad keen culture vultures‘ but we do have our moments. The odd concert here and there; the odd exhibition now and again. Sooo, as we approached the rather grandiose home of Scotland’s art treasures we had but one thought … ‘they must do a scone in there’!

Gallery at the Scottish National Gallery
Inside the Scottish National Gallery

 

Once inside and as we walked around one of the galleries. We paused in front of a small Rembrandt and wondered if you might be interested in our thoughts on the iconicity of the gesture spatially undermining the substructure of critical thinking … or … if you might like us just to get straight to the scones? Okay, the scones have it! Like many galleries it is both fabulous and pretentious in almost equal quantities but The Scottish Café wins, hands down, when it come to pretentiousness. Who came up with that name? It had better be good!? Internal view of the Scottish Café & Restaurant at the National Gallery, Edinburgh

Deceased sconeys spinning

Early signs were less than encouraging because it’s a bit of a soulless barn of a place and all self service. The young girl we got to help us was not from the UK and acted as if she wished she had never come. When asked if we could have something other than a paper cup for our coffee … no, was the monosyllabic answer! Ah well, after our recent sojourn at the Wee Lochan this was a bit of a let down. It’s not cheap either … £3 for a fruit scone must have had deceased sconeys everywhere spinning in their graves. In their favour, it has to be said that the café and the rather nice looking restaurant next door, do try to use locally produced Scottish fare. A large blackboard, next to where we sat, explained it all in exquisite if somewhat bewildering detail. Food source map at the Scottish Café & Restaurant at the National Gallery, Edinburgh

Value for money?

There was only one scone left. That we had no option but to share, so we got a pain au chocolat to share as well. A scone at the Scottish Café & Restaurant at the National Gallery, EdinburghAfter we had cleared a table to sit at we looked at what we had got; a self cleared table, an expensive scone, a wooden knife, two pats of butter, a wee bowl of jam and coffee in paper cups. Things were not looking too good. Pat, however, started on her half of the pain au chocolat and was soon making all sorts of soft “mmmmm” noises.
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Eventually, once I had unpacked the butter and spread the jam, I took a mouthful of scone. Damn it, it was good as well! Maybe it was because of our expectations being lowered to such an extent by the surroundings and service that we thought they were good. But no, they actually were good. In fact it might have got a topscone if we hadn’t felt it would unfair to the likes of Fonab Castle and the Wee Lochan where the value for money is much much greater – no topscone! You see, we can be ruthless when it comes to maintaining standards!

View from the Scottish Café & Restaurant at the National Gallery, Edinburgh
View from The Scottish Café & Restaurant
Grasping at straws

Talking of standards, we watched the debate in Parliament about Trump’s state visit later this year. It was good to see our elected representatives at full throttle, giving it wellie on both sides of the argument. And struggling to make themselves heard over the anti-Trump protests going on outside in the street. The visit will go ahead of course. At the moment, the government is grasping at anything that looks vaguely like a straw. However, it’s a pity he won’t be able to address Parliament. With all the eloquence of a football manager, it might have been a good watch.

p.s. apologies to football managers everywhere.

EH2 2EL    tel: 0131 225 1550   The Scottish Café & Restaurant

Scones

Café Gandolfi

2 Comments

Believe it or not this restaurant, Café Gandolfi, derived it’s named from a camera. The famous plate camera made for 120 years by Louis Gandolfi and his family in London.

Gandolfi cameras

And believe or not, at the risk of appearing much much more ancient than I actually am, I did all of my training at Napier College in Edinburgh using these cameras. It wasn’t that long ago … honest!

Picture of a 5"x4" Gandolfi plate camera
Gandolfi 5″x4″ plate camera

At the time, PhotoShop had not even been thought of so all converging verticals and other distortions had to be corrected using camera movements. And heaven help you if you got it wrong by a few millimetres. You were sent back out again until you got it right!

When I see the ease with which photographs are taken nowadays, even I can hardly believe that this is what we used to use. Complete with a dark cloth over the head so that you could see the upside-down 5″x4″ image on the ground glass. Seems like another world. Recently we dropped in on a photographer friend at Wildgrass Studios near Lix Toll and imagine my surprise when he said “Bill, I have to let you see my new camera“. I expected the latest digital whizbang thingy but instead he dragged out a huge box from which he proudly produced an old 10″x12” plate camera. And  he uses it to produce stunning images that he sells online … brilliant!

As a plooky youth I did not really appreciate the fabulous workmanship in these hand crafted items and usually lusted after the all-metal MPP or Sinar equivalents … oh, the foolishness of youth!

Photographers and scones
Picture of stained glass at Café Gandolfi
one of Gandolfi’s stained glass pieces
Picture of artwork at Café Gandolfi
not the angel of the north – part of a permanent exhibit

Another photographer, Iain Mackenzie, who hailed from the Isle of Lewis, did appreciate them however. In 1979 he decided to start up a restaurant in the old Merchant City, a very run down part of Glasgow at that time. He opted to call it Café Gandolfi. Presumably to reflect the fine craftmanship he hoped to reproduce with his uniquely Scottish food. With it he introduced the first cappuccino machine to Glasgow. It gave the city a taste of the flourishing café society it enjoys today.

We were slightly fearful that such a trendsetting place would find scones a wee bit mundane. Our fears were groundless. We were told that scones were available upstairs in Bar Gandolfi. So up we went! This is a relatively new addition but it is very much in the Gandolfi style. They normally have lots of art on display but unfortunately we visited in the few days between their monthly exhibitions.

Not to worry we were looking forward to our Gandolfi scones … and when they arrived we were not disappointed. They were just the way we like them, crunchy outside and soft in the middle. Picture of a scone at Café GandolfiThere was no cream but the jam and butter more than made up for that. After much deliberation, however, we decided that they just missed out on topscone. But only by a very fine whisker, pity! Louis Gandolfi was an Italian immigrant. Like lots of other immigrants, he decided to move here and establish businesses which would help and contribute to the overall well-being of both themselves and the UK. In other words, they expected, like most immigrants, to contribute to their host nation through taxes and such like.

Taxes and all that

It is ironic therefore, to say the least, that Trump is now being hailed by his supporters as a ‘business genius’ for having paid no tax whatsoever in the past 18 years. Picture of the Gandolfi works in LondonAbhorrent as this may appear to all right minded people, it seems strangely indicative of the times we live in. If readers spot anyone who isn’t avoiding tax at this week’s Tory party conference we urge you to get in touch with the BBC. We are sure it would make headline news … not! We also suspect that Louis Gandolfi was a much better business man than Donald Trump could ever hope to be. So it’s appropriate that his name is commemorated so fittingly here in Glasgow. Definitely worth a visit!

G1 1NY      tel: 0141 552 6813      Café Gandolfi

Ordinary, Scones

Henderson’s Salad Table

2 Comments

Life, after the result of the EU referendum, seems somehow surreal. To make matters worse, in escaping from a boiling hot auction house in Edinburgh, we find ourselves here in what is, for us, almost some sort of parallel universe .. a vegan restaurant. Henderson’s, to be precise. Hendersons 03Now, we are the sort of people who will eat pretty much anything without thinking too much about it. And thoroughly enjoy it. So coming face to face with a vegan scone made us realise that our understanding of veganism was somewhat sketchy. Google to the rescue!!

Vegan s defined

Apologies to those who already know, but the Vegan Society definition is “A philosophy and way of living which seeks to exclude—as far as is possible and practicable—all forms of exploitation of, and cruelty to, animals for food, clothing or any other purpose; and by extension, promotes the development and use of animal-free alternatives for the benefit of humans, animals and the environment. In dietary terms it denotes the practice of disHendersons 02pensing with all products derived wholly or partly from animals.” Great, all very laudable so long as they understand that that approach is a luxury. It is afforded to them by modern day living where supermarkets provide a ridiculous variety and range of just about everything. If they had to apply that principle in ‘Scotland of old’ their state of health would be best described as ‘dead’.

Anyway, apart from all that, this is a nice place with very friendly staff. Our one regret is that we chickened out on the vegan scone and opted for a cheeseHendersons 06 one. Our duty as sconeys should have been to try the vegan variety and report back to you, the reader. A mistake, one we will rectify in due course. This place was started in 1962 by Janet Henderson to provide an outlet for produce from her East Lothian farm. It is still owned by the Henderson family and has expanded over the years.

Square meals all round

We were in the ‘Salad Table’ on the corner of Hanover and Thistle Street but there is also a dedicated Vegan restaurant at the opposite end of the block (joined by an underground tunnel). There’s also a shop/deli in the basement. Our cheese scone was very good, not quite a topscone but pretty close. The coffee was excellent and, in keeping with their health philosophy, water is supplied with everything. Maybe it is just our prejudice coming to the fore but it seemed to us that most of the people coming and going, including the staff, just needed a good square meal to cheer them up.Hendersons 04

Where did David go?

Back to the real world. Ah yes, everything is broken … the EU, the UK, the markets. To try and solve a rift within the Tory party, Cameron gambled big time on ‘remain’ winning. They didn’t and now he has crawled off under a stone and left the resultant mess for others to clear up. The ‘Leave’ campaign obviously did not expect to win since they have no strategy whatsoever for the way forward. The Labour party, useless as ever! The EU does have a strategy though. They want rid of us as soon as possible and who could blame them? The UK has always been a shabby member of the EU. After we leave, vegans will probably thrive on the diet of baked beans we will all be on. Maybe we should all think about converting?

EH2 1DR          tel: 0131 225 2131            Hendersons