Tag Archives: Donald Trump

Ordinary, Scones

The Brown Palace Hotel

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In the face of the current Caronavirus outbreak, the government is concerned for the elderly. Fair enough we thought. Then we realised that they were talking about us. The nerve! Funny how, when you get to a certain age, in spite of the fact that every limb is creaking, it still never crosses your mind that you could be classed as ‘elderly’. Now they are also saying that we have to self isolate for four months. Jings, crivvens, help ma bob! In Scottish, that phrase indicates a level of astonishment towards the very top of the scale.

Logo of the Brown Palace HotelCould this mean the end of sconology as we know it? Not a bit of it because today our scone comes from the Brown Palace Hotel in Denver, Colorado. Eh? Yes, yet again, another of our dedicated band of correspondents has ridden to the rescue. So it’s not us, it’s them, our USA correspondents. And this is not just any old common or garden US motel, like you might find in Schitt’s Creek this an altogether classier establishment. In their own words:

“We were staying at The Brown Palace Hotel in Denver, Colorado. It was built in terms of American history, a long time ago, circa 1892, so it’s fairly new!! The hotel’s claim to fame is the large number of celebrities who have stayed. Including almost every US President except Obama and Trump. What’s interesting is that no-one said why they didn’t stay, they were more interested in telling us that the Beatles stayed, maybe even in the same Presidential suite we had, who knows.  Molly Brown, a famous survivor from the Titanic, stayed for a couple of weeks it seems, but the hotel is not named after her, just a coincidence.

Winning bulls

Another great feature if you happen to be in the hotel during the stock show is that they bring in the winning bull, right into the lobby for all to see, and smell. We missed that but did get to enjoy the very historic building and the very friendly staff.

Internal view of the Brown Palace Hotel, Denver, ColoradoEvery day they have Afternoon Tea in the main 8 stories high atrium. It’s a beautiful room with a piano player and ladies dressed in fancy hats, with ripped jeans. It’s Colorado, things are pretty relaxed here. With all the marijuana being consumed and the thin air, everyone seems a bit light-headed.  

Titanic

What could not be obtained was coffee, “no sir, this is afternoon tea, we don’t have coffee making facilities available”. Coffee was obtained from the bar, and the scones put to the test.Afternoon tea at the Brown Palace Hotel Real clotted cream, OK. Jarred, decent brand jam, OK. But, the scones were small in stature, and basically impossible to put either cream or jam on. I did try to do the jam first in an attempt to hold it together, but it ended up looking like trifle on the plate once the cream was added. Scones at the BrownIf the Titanic hit an iceberg with the consistency of the aforementioned scone, it would still be sailing today, probably spreading Covid-19 as good as any other ship. Of course, with the scone being obtained as a “perk” for being a Marriott Ambassador Elite member, therefore, no charge, I kept my disappointment to myself, and the fine folks reading here.View from 14,000feet to the top of Pikes Peak, Colorado

Colorado

Colorado is an amazing state. You go from desert-like conditions that are dry and arid, 20 C, and then climb 14,000feet to the top of Pikes Peak and it’s -5 C , all in the same day. My mum would love the drive up there, with the sheer drops of 1000 feet or more on one side and the snow piled up on the other. Now it’s the trip back home going from hand sanitizer to hand sanitizer, staying 6 feet from the nearest human as much as possible and holding your breath for the whole 2-hour flight back. Unless, of course, Mr Trump says we can’t and stops more travel”.

Gratis scones

No topscone unfortunately but we are indebted to our correspondents for their excellent report. They were right when they said that the hotel was not named after Titanic’s Molly Brown. It’s named after its founder, real estate developer, Henry Cordes Brown. The triangular plot the hotels sits on was where he used to graze his cow. Nowadays they even have colonies of bees on the roof. It’s part of their drive to be as green as possible. We were not aware that it was possible to get free scones anywhere so we will have to look into this Ambassador Elite shenanigans.Honey bees at the Brown Palace Hotel

Sliced bread

We have come to the conclusion that coronavirus is the best thing since sliced bread. Judging by the news, wars have ceased, famine has been eradicated, refugees have stopped coming, climate change has become of little consequence … brill! Oh but the stock market? We don’t want to appear selfish or self-centred but will our pensions be okay? Will we ever get to stay in the Presidential Suite at the Brown Palace Hotel … and get gratis scones?? And before you ask, yes, we’re okay for toilet rolls.

CO 80202       tel: +1 303-297-3111          Brown Palace

///types.honey.funds

Scones, Top, topweird

The Little Bakery

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Today we are in South Queensferry at The Little Bakery. It’s a bit of a misnomer because once you get inside it’s really quite big. There’s a couple of seating areas at the front, another at the side and yet another downstairs at the back. The town itself is very pretty with narrow cobbled streets and quaint houses. It’s designed for horses and carts rather than the juggernauts that are here today creating chaos as they try to manoeuvre between the buildings with inches to spare.

A view of the Forth Bridge
The Forth Rail Bridge, opened exactly 130 years ago

Nothing much has changed here over the centuries other than the addition of the odd bridge or three. And, as you walk around, it’s olde worlde charm makes it very easy to forget what a crazy crazy world we live in.

A view of the Forth Road Bridge
The Forth Road Bridge and the Queensferry Crossing
Good British viruses

President Trump has just banned all travel to the US from Europe because of coronavirus. Mysteriously, the UK has an exemption, however. This must be one of the first benefits of not being in Europe or does he not realise that although we’ve left the EU, we haven’t actually physically moved. Or does Trump have an ulterior motive, a trade deal perhaps? Yes, think we’ll go with that one. Or maybe he thinks the British virus, is much healthier than those from countries that don’t speak English. Who knows what, if anything, goes on in his head? Thankfully his aides have now come out to correct everything he said.

Internal view of the Little Bakery, South QueensferryThe Chancellor, Rishi Sunak, delivered his first budget the other day. It was full of bountiful gifts for ‘the people’. The only thing lacking was any sense of a grip on reality. Apparently, the past decade has been forgotten where untold hardships were inflicted on the poor so that the rich could get richer. And it’s not as if all this austerity now puts us in a position where we have accumulated enough that we can dish out money left, right and centre. No, no, no, it will all have to be borrowed, about £100bn! Brilliant, I could be Chancellor!

Meaningless opposition

We don’t blame Boris or Rishi however, we blame Jeremy Corbyn.  Having no idea what he or his party stood for, he left the people with no choice but to vote Tory and hence we end up where we are today. And he’s still there at the Dispatch Box … a totally meaningless opposition figure. Go Jeremy, just go!

A scone at the Little Bakery, South QueensferryThis is all very well but we can hear you crying “Were there scones at the Little Bakery? Just get to the point?” Okay, yes there were!

Not only scones but an array of delicious looking baking that could easily have induced overindulgence. We maintained discipline, however, and after a light lunch, we just had our scones. Pat had fruit and I had a raspberry and chocolate chip. It had to be done! They were fab! Wonderful texture and with a lovely crunch. The only downside was messy fingers from the melting chocolate. A real dilemma when you’re not supposed to lick your fingers nowadays. We just licked anyway! Having forgotten to ask for cream we ended up not bothering.  To be honest the scones were so good they didn’t need any further embellishment. This is a really nice place and we think that you would be hard pushed to have a disappointing visit. Easiest topscone in ages.

A wall of flowers at the Little Bakery, South Queensferry
A wall of flowers at the Little Bakery
Lucky, lucky, lucky

We have reviewed several scones in South Queensferry. Five years ago we reviewed the Jitter Bean Café. That was when the EU was in the process of bailing out Greece with a £50bn loan. When we left the Little Bakery we thought we would take a stroll and see how it was doing. Sadly it has gone and been changed into something else. As far as we know, Greece is still there so it must have fared a bit better. While we walked along the street we came on this large wall plaque. When you consider that back in 1817 the inhabitants of South Queensferry were indebted to the ‘liberality’ of someone for a bleaching green and some water we should be a little more thankful for what we have today. We are all very lucky really. Okay, we’re a bit short on bleaching greens but we do have water and raspberry and chocolate chip scones!

EH30 9PP       tel: 0131 319 2255        Little Bakery

///disco.flesh.organisms

Scones, Top

Palm Court

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Well, here we are, our first scone since leaving Europe. The choice was either to go into some sort of maudling inward-looking period of navel-gazing or go out and have a scone. Afternoon tea graphic at the Palm CourtGuess which one we chose? In addition, we felt that we might as well celebrate our newfound freedom from the civilising influences of our EU friends with something a bit posh. Hence you find us closeted in the rather sumptuous confines of the Palm Court in Edinburgh’s Balmoral Hotel.

The exterior of the hotel is a marvelous confection in stone (Balmoral means “the majestic dwelling” in Gaelic) and the inside is equally elaborate. However, if you are one of those who only feel truly relaxed in the surroundings of a greasy spoon diner, this is not the place for you. On our long sconological journey, we have come to tolerate sumptuous surroundings like this with relative ease. The benefits of perseverance.

Palm Court logoWe’re here because one of the advantages of writing a scone blog is that friends and family tend to buy us gifts in line with our interests … and, as you know, we have very narrow interests. So it was on this occasion, a complimentary champagne afternoon tea … yeah! Many thanks to our benefactors. We were on time. The hotel is perched above Waverley Station so the clock is always set three minutes fast as an aid to travellers trying to catch a train. Hogmanay is the one exception in the year when it is spot on.

Famous faces

Internal view of the Palm Court, Balmoral HotelFilm stars, Prime Ministers and Royalty have all stayed here, so of course, we felt at home straight away. Suite 552 is even named after JK Rowling who wrote her final Harry Potter novel here. Once we had got past the suitably suited and booted doorman we were welcomed by a lovely young lady called Lucy. She hailed from Menton in the south of France, a part of the world we know quite well. Monte Carlo and all that! A few months back we even posted a scone from the Scotch Tea House in Nice. champagne afternoon teaAnyway, Lucy had been doing a hospitality course back home and when she finished she chose Scotland for her first real job. We warmed to her immediately. She settled us in and soon had us sorted with a couple of glasses of Charles Heidsieck champs while we perused the tea menu.

Tea pouring ceremony at Palm CourtI opted for the Cloud tea for no other reason than that’s where all my personal data resides. Pat went for 2nd flush … not sure why. We’re not great tea connoisseurs. However, it’s nice to try new ones every now and again even though we always revert back to good old breakfast tea. When ours arrived another young lady shattered our nerves by pouring the boiling water into the teapots from a great height. Not sure if that enhances the taste in any way but it certainly gave the whole procedure an air of high drama. She didn’t spill a drop!

Three tiers

Normally, with an afternoon tea, everything comes on a three-tier cake stand. Savouries on the bottom, scones in the middle and cakes on top. Not here! We did get the cake stand but all three tiers were laden with savoury items … it was only the first course. Everything was delicious.Scones at the Palm Court, Balmoral Hotel, EdinburghLater we got the second course – the scones. As expected there were two each and they came beautifully warm, lightly dusted with icing sugar and presented with lots of jam and clotted cream. Meanwhile, Lucy refreshed our teapots and generally ensured that we lacked for nothing. Unsurprisingly, perhaps the scones were fab and what with the surroundings and the harpist playing in the small juliet balcony above our heads, we almost felt as if we were in Verona. It wasn’t that difficult a decision to make … topscone!

gifts at the Balmoral Hotel, Edinburgh
A parting gift of tea, chocolates and mini ice cream cones.
Good taste

It was so civilised as we lingered under the palm trees sipping champagne, eating scones and being pampered by Lucy. We could easily have believed we are still in Europe. Thoughts of bush fires, coronavirus, Boris’s lies, Trump’s lies, Syria, and climate change were banished to someplace far far away. Later, when we were preparing to rejoin the real world we asked Lucy if she would return to the south of France after her placement here was finished. She replied, “No, I plan to stay in Scotland, I really love it”. It’s true, the French really do have good taste! Even we had to admit – if this is what being out of Europe is like, it’s not that bad!

Wellington statue, Princes Street
The Duke of Wellington pointing at the clock and saying “that clock is three minutes fast”.

EH2 2EQ.       tel: 0131 556 2414         Balmoral

///driven.behind.insist

ps Thanks go to one of our New Zealand correspondents. They sent photos of a scone extravaganza that recently took place at Papanui Club Bowling Club in Christchurch. Scones at Papanui Bowling Club, Christchurch, NZThat’s a lot of scones!

Ordinary, Scones

Café in the Kirk

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Recently, we have come to the conclusion that we could do this blog without ever having to leave our home town of Falkirk. Every time we turn our back, a new cafe or restaurant pops up. Okay, slight exaggeration but only slight. This post from the Café in the Kirk is a typical example.

The Speckled Church

Café in the Kirk has been on the go for a few years, however, not being noted for our religiosity, it just hadn’t registered. Today, however, was the day! Falkirk Trinity Church itself came about fairly recently when three churches merged their congregations … hence the name. A sign of the times, no doubt. Before that, it was the Old Parish Church, a place of worship since the 7th century. Back then it was known as the ‘faw kirk’ or ‘speckled church’ from which the town eventually took its name. Even today, locals tend to pronounce it Fa’kirk. With.soldiers from both the 1298 and the 1746 Battles of Falkirk buried in the graveyard, the church pretty much tells the story of Scotland.

Internal view of Café in the Kirk, FalkirkTo our great surprise, the Café in the Kirk was very busy, with no available tables. This surprised us in more ways than one. On the way in we had been amply warned by an elderly couple who were sitting outside “the lentil soup isn’t good“, accompanied by knowing glances and shaking heads.  In spite of this, we decide to persevere and it wasn’t long before a table became free and we were in … yeah!

Romantic scones

One distinct advantage of coming here was that we felt distinctly young … probably the youngest in the place. The surroundings were fairly utilitarian, brightly lit, oilcloth table coverings, etc. Perhaps not the place to come for a romantic scone. We were attended to by a lovely lady who was dragging a leg. She reminded me of my mother who spent years serving lunches to perfectly able-bodied people while she hobbled around on a walking stick. Needless to say, we cleared our own table then helped our lady deliver our lunches. It seemed like the least we could do. Previously, we had noticed that there were only two scones left. An anxious few minutes were spent waiting to place our order hoping no one else would get them before us. Was that sinful or was that sinful?

Momentary relief

While we were waiting for our lunch to be prepared we noticed this wall poster. Obviously there is a God posterObviously we were heartened by this news and, considering our fraught lives, decided to follow the advice. Joyous relief! However, when we asked for the password for the wifi we were informed: ” for church use only!” Goodness, that didn’t last long. Now we are worried and not enjoying life nearly as much as we did a minute ago. We’re pretty sure God didn’t actually have a hand in this decision, but still?

 

A scone at Café in the Kirk, Falkirk

Although our lunch was great, by the time we got to our scones,  expectations were not exactly riding high. However, we were to be confounded yet again … they were delicious! Very fresh and a lovely soft texture throughout. Turned out that our lady with the leg had baked them. If we had been able to get cream this could have been the first topscone of 2020, however, sadly, it was not to be. We are pretty sure that this place is entirely run by volunteers so we are reluctant to be too critical. Overall it’s very good and great value for money.

Celebrate or protest?

Now that the big decision has been taken Brexit barely gets a mention in the news. Attention has been diverted to Trump’s impeachment trial in the US and, of course, the supremely important matter of Harry and Meghan’s future happiness. Yet it is only a matter of days until we finally leave the EU … in Scotland’s case, very much against its will. In fact, the Scottish, Welsh and N.Irish Parliaments have all voted down the EU Withdrawal Bill. Will that make any difference? Not a bit! While Boris tries to determine what sort of celebrations will be used to mark the occasion on the 31st, we suspect that, in other parts of our broken UK, the mood will be more one of betrayal.

The minister of this church, an ardent supporter of Scottish Independence, wrote about the situation in his most recent blog. Yes, good people write blogs as well!  He finished with this simple prayer “God, please help us. Amen.” Let’s hope He is listening!

FK1 1JN       tel: 01324 611017       Café in the Kirk

///over.sector.news

ps Many thanks to The Laird who notified us of a Falkirk made K6 proudly standing outside the Jamaica Inn on Bodmin Moor in Cornwall. Picture courtesy of haunted rooms.co.uk

K6 outside the Jamaica Inn
Jamaica Inn made famous by Daphne du Maurier novel by the same name

pps Thanks also to one of our Kiwi correspondents for this pic of her home-baked blueberry and banana muffins. Okay, not scones but they do look delicious.  Maybe we need to broaden our scope and visit the gumdiggers of Dargaville?Blueberry & banana muffins in Dargaville

Ordinary, Scones

Antonio’s Deli

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Well here we are in Antonio’s Deli! Not only in a new year but in a new decade.  A happy, healthy and sconey 2020 to one and all. We have had two weeks of grandkids over the festive season and have come out the other side in much the same way as a couple emerging from a bomb blast – wide eyed and tousle haired but otherwise unscathed … and thankful to have survived!

Things have quietened down now and as we return to some semblance of normality we venture forth like two polar bears emerging, blinking into the spring sunshine. Our last scone was at The Lobster Pot where we asked readers to interpret a puzzling diorama. You may remember some of its contents – a naked lady, a lobster, a snake and a welly wearing dog. Disappointingly, though perhaps unsurprisingly, there were no responses. The mystery remains … unless?

Logo for Antonios Deli in FalkirkThe Lobster Pot was some time ago, however, so we felt that only small steps would be advisable at first to get us back into the sconological swing. Antonio’s Deli was the answer. We can only imagine that the “bistrot” bit is a printing error. Only a short walk from our house and associated with one of our favourite Italian restaurants, Cafe Corvina. However, at Antonio’s we were looked after, not by an Italian, but a lovely Rumanian lady. She delivered the devastating news that she only had one scone left. And, yes, when we looked over at the counter, there it was, a fruit scone in all its solitary splendour. No choice but to share.

Just as we were about to cut it in half, however, we heard our Rumanian lady trying to explain to a rather distraught gentleman at the next table that there were no scones left. We called over and explained that we had the last one. Gosh, if looks could kill! We offered to sell it to him for £5 but he rather ungraciously declined.

New friend

In case it would upset him further we tA scone at Antonios Deli in Falkirkried not to issue “mmmm” noises as we ate. Not that difficult really because, although it was nice enough, it definitely wasn’t a topscone. No cream and the butter and jam came from everywhere except Scotland … and you all know what we think about that! In the end our gentleman got over his disappointment and chatted with us quite affably. He reckoned that the best scones in the Falkirk area were at Dobbies Garden Centre.  We didn’t disagree. He also gave us a hot tip for a scone in Dennyloanhead. We didn’t embrace or kiss or anything but parted as scone appreciating friends … respect!

Internal view of Antonios Deli in FalkirkVideo Games

2020 seems like the beginning of a new decade that, by some accounts, we might not see the end of. We don’t want to appear alarmist, however, what with Greta predicting imminent climactic Armageddon and Indonesia and Australia doing their level best to prove her right, you can’t really blame us for bringing it your attention. On top of all that we have Britain leaving the EU in a couple of weeks and Trump picking a re-election fight with Iran. It’s scary and almost impossible to imagine that someone sitting in an office in Arizona or Essex can, joystick in hand, kill someone driving along a road several thousand miles away. Video games but with real life casualties. To us it seems a particularly cowardly and ungallant way of conducting foreign policy.

Logo for Antonios Deli in FalkirkPresumably they could do the same to all of us? Okay, sconeys are unlikely to ever be seen as a serious threat to world peace but just think of when these deadly drones are small enough and cheap enough to be given as Christmas presents. With such powerful tools at their disposal the barbarian “cream first” sconeys of Devon might try and exterminate all right thinking sconeys caught in the act of putting jam on first. Since there was no cream in Antonio’s Deli this was not an issue. At no time did we feel even vaguely threatened.

Anyway, onwards and upwards. Now that we have stuck our toes back into the scone-land water, we may venture even further next time.

FK1 1HR          tel: 01324 637000        Antonios

///friday.keeps.melt

ps Australia has more than enough problems at the moment and our sympathies go out to them. Thank goodness for our miserable, cool but moderate climate back here in Scotland … 16°C forecast for tomorrow though?? Might have to get the deckchairs out early.Australian sconeBuried in our labyrinthine computer we found this pic of our Toowoomba correpondents enjoying an Australian scone. They’ve got cream! Don’t know anything else about it but lets hope that good scone times return to Aus very soon.

Scones, Top

Singl-end Café & Bakehouse

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Duke of Wellington statue at Singl-end Café, Glasgow
Glasgow Council, after years of removing the traffic cone from the Duke of Wellington’s statue only for it to reappear the next day eventually gave up. Now a major tourist attraction and emblazoned on memorabilia like this tea towel

For those not familiar with Scottish vernacular, or, to be more precise, Glasgow vernacular, a “singl-end,” or single-end was the name for a tiny tenement room into which large families were packed back in the good old days. Toilets were on the landings and could be shared with up to ten other families. This was a dreadful way of life which thankfully no longer exists. The term “singl-end”, however, is still sometimes used today to remember with misty eyed fondness those times. Times of close community when everyone knew everyone else and looked after each other. As a way of life the singl-end probably gave rise to Glasgow’s unique friendliness. A sense of humour was the minimum required to survive in such conditions and combined with a down to earth irreverence and an ability to laugh at themselves, Glasgow is like no other city.

Posh?

Pat, a proud Weegie, wasn’t brought up in a singl-end, rather a “room and kitchen”. Having a separate kitchen didn’t exactly make you posh but it was definitely one up from a singl-end!

Internal view of Singl-end Café, GlasgowWhen we came across the Singl-end Café & Bakehouse it just had to be done. And what a find! It’s in a basement so is virtually invisible from the street. Not that that is holding it back, when we arrived it was  busy busy … and it’s nothing like a singl-end at all, it’s huge! It has what we would describe as a kind of hip feel about it so naturally, being pretty hip ourselves, we felt at home straight away. It’s veggie and vegan friendly without being at all shoutie about it … brill!

Creme de la creme

The staff were an absolute delight and they soon had us set up with some absolutely delicious lunch. The problem was that there was so much delicious lunch that we feared we might not manage the scoLogo of Singl-end Café, Garnethillnes we had spotted earlier. Undeterred, however, we let our tummies settle down for a while then ordered our scones. When we asked for cream with our scones a funny thing happened. But first let us ask a question. “What cheese would you use to hide a horse?” Don’t think about it too long …  it’s mascarpone, obviously! When we asked for cream our waitress said “It’s mascarpone cream” followed by “Its nice” when she saw our consternation. It’s veggie so it fits with their ethos. So the final order was a fruit scone for Pat and a blueberry and pistachio scone with blackcurrant jam and mascarpone cream for me. Life on  the edge.

A scone at the Singl-end Café, GlasgowOne very noticeable thing about this place is that the service is almost instantaneous. lightening quick! So, almost immediately, our scones were in front of us served up on wooden chopping boards. They were really good and the mascarpone cream was really good as well.  We loved everything about Singl-end Café & Bakehouse. There is another Singl-end nearer the city centre but we wish they would venture out to the provinces and open one nearer us.

Mickey Mouse

Each table in Singl-end has a glass top and underneath the glass is an array of odd and totally unrelated items – postcards, bits of hand written letters, drawings and sketches … a really fascinating Grenada postage stampmiscellany of stuff. At my seat a stamp from Grenada caught my eye. Can you ever see the UK issuing a stamp featuring Donald Duck? We can’t imagine anything ever inducing the ‘stiff upper lip’ British government to do such a thing. One featuring Mickey Mouse might be appropriate though considering the present state of our politics. The other Donald seems to be pulling all the strings in our upcoming election. Acting on The Donald’s instructions, Nigel Farage has suddenly gone from all principled and powerful back to his usual sniveling self.

Another question “What cheese would you use to coax a bear out of a tree?” The answer – camembert! We know, the jokes are even worse than the politics!

G3 6TT       tel: 0141 353 1277          Singl-end Café and Bakehouse

///pans.slows.simply

ps It is with great sadness that we report the passing of one of our correspondents who hailed from Stenhousemuir … the SteniBrainFart. He contributed to several posts like Brians Café and The Loft. We named him thus because of his uncanny knack of instantly coming up with oodles of useless information on just about any subject under the sun. He was proud of the name and signed his emails with it. He will be greatly missed.

Scones, Top

Muircot Farm Shop

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Old photo of Muircot Farm Shop, Tillicoultry
I, at least, am getting old. I remember this sort of scene growing up in Glen Isla

Now that the summer is pretty well over we have reverted to our old routine of going to the early morning show at our local Hippodrome cinema. Today we saw The Farewell, a true story about lies … no, nothing to do with Boris! We thoroughly enjoyed it. It was our kind of film … no loud sounds, no nudity, no violence and no CGI. Are we getting old?

Afterwards we decide to act on a tip off we had received from our ever diligent Trossachs correspondents. They flagged up Muircot Farm Shop as a place they thought we would enjoy. It’s just outside the Clackmannanshire village of Coalsnaughton so not too far to drive after our movie.

Old photo of Muircot Farm Shop, Tillicoultry
I remember this precursor to the combine harvester as well. Nowadays we can proudly say that we know someone with nine combine harvesters … yes, nine!
Good advice

Those Trossachs folk know us too well. We were super impressed by everything. In some ways it is just like a multitude of other farm shops … a big shed! However this one seemed to have a slightly different vibe. Not sure if it was the warm and friendly staff, the spacious layout or the fabulous view of the Ochil hills, but it just felt good.

Internal view of Muircot Farm Shop, TillicoultryAs we ordered some lunch and were trying to make up our minds whether to have a scone each or to share one, our waitress said “you will get a lot of bread with your soup“. Sound advice as it turned out. Almost half a loaf of wonderfully soft whole meal bread made us very glad we decided to share a scone.

Topscone was an easy decision right from the start. Just the right size, wonderful texture with plenty of fruit and lots of jam and cream to go with it. Judging by the healthy portion sizes, you got the feeling that this place is run by a farmer’s wife. No one is going to leave hungry. Inevitably, in farm shops, you are tempted to buy a lot of stuff from the shop. That’s the whole idea after all! This was no exception. We came away with a great selection of goodies to take home.

The final solution

Recently we have met many people confused about what is happening with Brexit. When we say that we know what is happening they are surprised and relieved when it is explained. For the bewildered of the world, here is our explanation:

  • 31st Oct – we leave the EU (do or die)
  • 1st Nov – Scotland gets independence
  • 2nd Nov – Scotland rejoins the EU
  • 3rd Nov – Scotland writes to the wise one, Donald Trump, asking advice on how to build a wall and get England to pay for it.

You will, of course, understand that this timetable is not set in stone. There may be some movement on specific dates. Never mind though, Brexit sanctuary can always be sought at Muircot Farm Shop. Excellent tip off

View of Ochil hills from Muircot Farm Shop, Tillicoultry
View towards Tillycoultry and the Ochil hills

FK13 6LS       tel: 01259 750886        Muircot Coffee Shop

///rotate.cashiers.enhances

ps  Thanks must go to our newest correspondents from Devon.  They sent us this picture of a Falkirk made K6 … not in Devon, but in Gramasdal on the Isle of Benbecula.  They were out for a walk!Carron foundry K6 at Gramasdal, Benbecula

Ordinary, Scones

The Canny Soul

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All hail Lady Hale. She has shown our Prime Minister to be an absolute bounder.  Some think her large spider brooch, was worn to illustrate what a tangled web we weave, however, she has unwittingly launched a whole new fashion movement. Who’d have thought they would have sold 5000 t-shirts sporting her brooch design within hours of it appearing?

Quite a month

Anyway, September has been quite a month for the UK. The Queen has been found to have meddled in the Scottish independence referendum of 2014. Much has been made in the press of the Palace’s disquiet at this being made public by David Cameron. Not a mention, however, of the disquiet of the people of Scotland who have known the Queen was set up for the past five years.

Dysfunctional

Now she’s embroiled in BoJo’s deceit over the prorogation of Parliament. Bad enough having a dysfunctional family to deal with, now she has a load of dysfunctional politicians as well. Who would be a Royal?

Internal view of the Canny Soul café in St AndrewsThe lesson we have taken from the Supreme Court’s ruling is that doing things unlawfully is okay. Pat and I have decided to start mugging people in an effort to enhance our meagre pensions. Yes, we know it’s unlawful but what the hell? If it’s good enough for Boris, surely it’s good enough for us too. St Andrews seemed like a good place to start. Lots of wealthy folk and stacks of American tourists.  Of course St Andrews is a university town (2nd best after Cambridge) so it’s brimming with students. We knew that there would be slim pickings mugging them … too poor and too fit. It would be the easiest thing in the world for them to run away from us.

Sign for the Canny Soul café in St AndrewsNo, we really needed to find people with walking sticks, or zimmers, preferably. Spotting likely victims is harder than you might think, however. After a while we were tired and found ourselves standing outside the Canny Soul café. We ended up not mugging anyone or, indeed, doing anything unlawful and going for a scone instead. Is that a huge collective sigh of relief we can hear? However, had we been caught mugging someone we would simply have explained that we disagreed it was unlawful. It works for Boris!

Definition of a Canny Soul

It turns out there is more to this place than meets the eye because, on the face of it, it’s not much to look at. Apparently a “canny soul” is someone who is: “neither above you or below you but is always by your side”. It’s a kind of lifestyle choice.

Picture of Marilyn Munro at the Canny Soul café in St Andrews
Marilyn Munro

One that was borne out by the place itself. All the staff were very happy and obliging. We’re not sure if this picture, which was prominent in the café, is of a “canny soul” but if Boris can learn to simper like this then he will probably get away with even more than he’s getting away with at the moment.

Sucking up

Everything we had was fine, however, our scones did not quite cut it. They seemed a wee bit tasteless. A scone at the Canny Soul café in St AndrewsNo topscone but the friendly atmosphere in the Canny Soul more than made up for it. They were indeed, canny souls. During some banter when we were leaving I complimented the middle aged owner on his youthful energy. He looked at me and said “ you have aged like a bottle of fine wine, I have aged like a bottle of milk!” Ten out of ten for observation … and sucking up to customers! Perhaps Boris should do a bit more sucking up rather than simply blustering blindly towards a no deal Brexit. He might even consider becoming a canny soul … or have we taken that too far?

The government has had to spend £billions repatriating holiday makers  after Thomas Cook’s  collapse and now Trump is being impeached. The world has gone mad … or madder! We still had a very enjoyable time in St Andrews however.

KY16 9QW     tel: 07712 423386       The Canny Soul TA

///liberated.rejoined.slept

Scones, Top

Japanese Gardens at Cowden

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This has definitely not been Prince Andrew’s week. He has won the “Most Useless Royal” accolade, admittedly against some very stiff competition. Presumably he also thinks he has thrown the media off the scent over his association with convicted sex offender Jeffrey Epstein. Good luck with that one! So desperate is he to regain some sort of respectability he is even thinking of getting back together with his ex-wife, Sarah. Alternatively he may just have to disappear for a while, but don’t worry, we have plenty more Royals lined up to take his title.

Gardens

Enough of that distasteful stuff! Such is the preponderance of Japanese gardens in central Scotland we have had to call this one the ‘Japanese Gardens at Cowden’ to differentiate them from the ‘Japanese Gardens at Dalziel House’. Who would have thought it? Both are just a short drive from where we live yet, until today, we had never been to either of them.

Oriental influences

We had spent the previous day chatting with a friend who lives in Tokyo and had our heads filled with everything Japanese. Hence today, feeling suitably inspired we set off for Cowden where we knew there was a Japanese garden. What’s one Japanese garden doing in the heart of Scotland you may well ask, never mind two? Well, this one is all down to one of these redoubtable Victorian ladies, Isabella ‘Ella’ Christie. She was born into money but she was remarkable because instead of sitting quietly doing embroidery, like many of her contemporaries, she traveled the world on her own. Particularly to countries like India, Tibet and Borneo. It was a visit to Japan, however, that sparked a fascination with their gardens and when she returned to Scotland she set about creating one here at Cowden Castle, her ancestral home, long since demolished.

View of the Japanese Garden at CowdenApparently when she was aged fifty and waiting for a train at the local station she was asked if she was traveling to Edinburgh … “no, Samarkand” was the reply. Gives you a sense of her indomitable spirit. To create the garden she even imported Japanese gardeners to help her with the task. Together they created a fabulous garden centered around a wee loch in the castle grounds. Sadly after Ella’s death in 1949 the garden suffered from neglect. Happily, it is now restored thanks to a charitable Trust. You can get an idea of the work that has been done in this little video.

Of course, we also knew that there was a tearoom at the gardens … as if an added incentive was necessary? Surprised though to find that the building housing the tearoom was nothing more than a rather utilitarian looking portakabin. Neverthel less, it served its purpose and we suspect that this is only a temporary arrangement until the charity that runs everything gets enough money to build something a bit more substantial. All the inside seats were taken so we had no choice but to sit outside. On a day like to today that’s what we would have chosen to do anyway.

Exciting!

We were served by a lovely elderly lady who began by apologising profusely for her lack of expertise. ThiA scone at the tearoom at The Japanese Garden at Cowdens was her first day doing this sort of work. Exciting for her and for us. We needn’t have worried though she soon had us sorted with some lunch and a fruit scone to share. The scone came with a little pot of jam and loads of whipped cream. For some reason we did not have high expectations and were pleasantly confounded when it turned out to be excellent. Topscone without a doubt!

The entrance to the Japanese Garden at Cowden
entrance to the gardens

One of Ella’s favourite haunts was Kashmir and we wonder what she would have made of the current disastrous situation there. In fact, what would she make of anything that is going on these days? Burning rain forests, Brexit, Trump, Johnson and Miley Cyrus‘ new tattoo? We are sure she would have found it all terribly tiresome. Ella called her Japanese Garden at Cowden ‘The Place of Pleasure and Delight’ … boy, do we need more places like that these days.

FK14 7PL       tel: 07570 614763        Japanese Garden

///racing.films.afterglow

ps Our Kiwi correspondents  have kindly sent a picture of some scones they thought were particularly good. They got them and some apple cake while dropping off some bulk fertiliser to friends in Whangarei just north of Aukland … don’t ask!They look absolutely delicious. Unfortunately, however, for readers, they are unavailable to the common people. Unless, of course, you happen to know Mary, their friend?Some Whangarei scones in New Zealand

 

Scones, topweird

Café des Fleurs

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Well, well, well! In the miniscule amount of time since our previous post at Mill House, Monzie we have chucked one Prime Minister on the scrap heap and replaced her with another … wow, such efficiency! It has to be said that the UK has a brilliant system whereby a mere handful of over-privileged, geriatric, tax dodging idiots are allowed to appoint the leader of the country. It’s amazing really but not unique … Russia and China have similar arrangements. Anyway the Trump clone that is Boris Johnston has so far refused to meet anyone in the EU … gosh, isn’t he a tough cookie? However, on Monday he did meet with Nicola Sturgeon at Bute House in Edinburgh. You shouldn’t read too much into the fact that he had to leave by the back door … no, you shouldn’t, really you shouldn’t!

Internal view of Café des Fleurs in Dollar

Day trip

Anyway, gripped as we were by Boris’s promise of a gazillion £s for Falkirk, today, to temper our excitement, we decided to get out of town and go for a drive along the Hillfoots. Turned out that our target scone cafe was  closed so we had to carry on into the pretty little town of Dollar. It’s the sort of town that probably harbours some of the idiots who voted for our new leader. Though to be fair, these idiots were being asked to choose between two other idiots … tricky! But never mind all that, here we found the delightful Café des Fleurs,  They only had a couple of outside tables, all taken, however it was no hardship and a bit cooler to sit inside.

Cream disasters

They advertise their scones as being ‘famous’ so obviously we had to determine whether this claim was justified or not. They had plain, fruit or blueberry and white chocolate scones. A scone at Café des Fleurs in DollarPat had fruit and, of course, I had to try the blueberry and white chocolate. Service was very friendly and efficient so it wasn’t long before we were all kitted out. Sacre bleu, mon dieu, it’s Rodda’s Cornish Cream again. I know we go on about it but why oh why do they do that when much better stuff is available locally? All in all we enjoyed Café des Fleurs. Pat thought her scone wasn’t quite top but mine, apart from the cream was excellent … topweirdscone. As for them being ‘famous’, well I guess they are a bit more now.

Queenie and Bojo

The cafe was nicely decorated with a kind of shabby-chic look. One of the pictures was a bit puzzling though. “Queenie says: coffee – the favourA picture at Café des Fleurs in Dollarite drink of the civilised” followed by “Give us a kiss”. We could argue that it’s tea that’s the favourite of the civilised however maybe that would be splitting hairs. If Queenie wants a kiss, however, she is going to have to wait a while … a long while! Bojo on the other hand would gladly give her a kiss, so desperate is he to please anyone he meets. You do wonder if the UK would ever have found itself in this ludicrous situation over Brexit and now with an equally ludicrous PM if we had had an opposition party worthy of the name. One can only wonder!External view of Café des Fleurs in Dollar

FK14 7DE              tel: 01259 743699        Cafe des Fleurs

///named.serious.shakes

ps Our intrepid Trossachs correspondents have just sent us photos of some telephone boxes up north. The first picture is of a fine array of K6s at Fort George, just east of Inverness. Bojo may be promising lots of money for Falkirk however it looks like Fort George will have more K6s than our home town. Falkirk is undergoing a programme of K6 removals, even though many were actually made there. First M&S deserted the town now our telephone boxes are going as well. What next? On the upside, if the money promised to the town ever appears, we will doubtless have Kelpies and Wheels all over the place.Three K6s at Fort George

The second K6 is from the Saracen foundry in Glasgow. It was at the Highland Folk Museum in Newtonmore. It even had the old mechanism with the A and B buttons. More than that it had a long set on instructions on how to make a telephone call. Also an advert for a brand new way to send greetings oversees … the new ‘De Luxe’ Telegram Service…. nostalgia!

Saracen foundry K6 at the Highland Folk Museum in Newtonmore

Many thanks once again to our correspondents.