Tag Archives: St Andrews

Kingsbarns Distillery

The point of today was to catch up with our Bathurst correspondents. We haven’t seen then since 2019 but they are over from Australia visiting their daughter and her family in St Andrews. This trusty pair have been responsible for much of our sconological knowledge of New South Wales with posts from Myrtle House, the Blue Wren Bush Cafe, Clancy’s Cafe and many more. Typically, they arrived on bikes for our meeting at Rufflets Hotel in Fife.

The Bathurst correspondents at Rufflets Hotel
Rendezvous with our Bathurst correspondents at Rufflets

It was fantastic to find them in good form and catch up on all their news. After a great chat, all too soon, we had to bid them farewell. We decided to try and find nearby Kingsbarns Distillery.Sign for Kingsbarns distillery

Crest of the Wymss Family
Crest of Clan Wemyss
This is definitely golf country. Thousands of golfers from all over the world make the pilgrimage to St Andrews, where it all started. It’s just seven miles away from Kingsbarns. It was a former golf caddie, Douglas Clement, who realised that golfers also loved the amber nectar but there was no handy distillery for them to visit. He decided that a disused building in Kingsbarns would be ideal. After a shaky start bogged down in financial woes, the Wemyss family (pronounced Weems), who live nearby in Wemyss Castle, came to the rescue. The distillery eventually opened in 2014. Kingsbarns got its name in 1519 when the barns here supplied the royal palaces at Falkland and Crail.
Internal view of Kingsbarns distillery
Good deals
When we arrived it was very busy with German and French tourists but it soon settled down when their buses left. The cafe is light and airy and they had scones – plain, fruit and cheese. You could get a bowl of soup packaged with a cheese scone so we went for that. We were going to share the cheese scone and then share a fruit scone with our tea later. Scones at Kingsbarns distilleryThe lady serving us said she would put it through as two soup/ scones because that would be cheaper for us … how thoughtful! We thoroughly enjoyed everything although they don’t have a kitchen so everything has to be brought in from external bakers Fisher & Donaldson in St Andrews.
Doves and pigeons
Kingsbarns Doocot whiskyNot a topscone but it’s great to see yet another new distillery trying to cater to the seemingly insatiable global demand for Scotch. Biggest market last year was France with India not far behind. Third was the US … come on guys, we thought it was “America first”. We did our bit by buying a bottle of Kingsbarns Doocot whisky as well as a bottle of their Darnley’s gin. A ‘doocot’ (part of a building housing doves and pigeons) forms part of the distillery building.
 
Kingsbarns Golf clubhouse
the back of the clubhouse on Kingsbarns Golf Links
We had been advised to go and visit Kingsbarns beach. Thinking it was simply a matter of walking towards the sea we inadvertently ended up trudging through Kingsbarns Gold Links. It’s a famous course which  has hosted many major tournaments … the helipad was a bit of a giveaway! Goodness, if we had known we wouldn’t have bothered with the car! Golf has been played here since 1793 and the 12th hole is a 606 yard monster. I only played golf as a youth. That was because I was too immature to realise it was a huge waste of time. Mind you, much of my golfing career was spent in the bushes looking for my ball.
 
Kingsbarns beach
We did eventually make it to the beach which stretches as far as the eye can see in both directions. However, the weather today was coming in from Greenland and wasn’t too conducive to building sand castles. 
Contentment
On the way home we paid a visit to Crail which was as quaint as ever.  
Crail harbour
Crail harbour

People in the Kingdom of Fife are an independent lot and quite content with their lot. Once, when a Fife man was asked if he had ever been abroad, responded with “I once knew a man who had been to Crail“. Maybe we should all try to be a bit more content like that man from Fife and not be surprised when other people from Sudan and elsewhere want to see if they can find contentment.

It has been another great day. We are sooo lucky to live in Scotland with all this stuff on our doorstep! The Doocot is lovely, by the way, light with a hint of pepperiness … a good breakfast whisky, cheers!

KY16 8QE.      tel: 01333 451300.        Kingsbarns Distillery

///bulky.orders.cuddled

Platinum Jubilee

Don’t think you could ever call us Royalists. That system of privilege and patronage seems better suited to a bygone era and totally at odds with modern day life. Odd as it may seem, we have actually met most of the Royal family (all except Andrew … phew!) and they all seem like really nice people. We’re pretty sure they do not want to spend their lives under the microscope of public and media scrutiny so why oh why are we allowed to do it to them? The fact that the Queen is celebrating her Platinum Jubilee is, of course, a personal triumph for her but given that all other news has apparently been cancelled we’re glad it only happens once every seventy years.

We’ll do anything!

Not wanting to appear too curmudgeonly, however, we ordered a Platinum Jubilee box from Haar At Home in St Andrews. Haar is a restaurant run by Masterchef Finalist, Dean Banks and we use it from time to time. You order it online and then it just appears at the door. It’s a kind of magic! The box had all sorts of stuff – smoked trout, a variety of cheeses, olives, chutney, pickle salad, chorizo, cheese and leek bread, caviar  … and, wait for it, scones with jam and clotted cream. Okay, okay, it’s pathetic, we’ll do anything for a scone.

There was far too much just for just the two of us so we had the pleasure of the company of our Trossachs correspondents to help us out. They did an excellent job though the meal was not without its difficulties. Do any of you have problems accessing your caviar? We did! caviar from Haar for the Platinum JubileeTry as we might we simply could not open the tin … imagine, so near yet so far. It became hilarious as the four of us came up with ever more incredulous ways of tackling it. Eventually the answer was to go to the garage and get a set of grips. The tin had to become pretty mangled before the top reluctantly popped off. Was it worth all the effort? Yes, everything was lovely and well worth the platinum amount of money we paid for it.

Uncategorised

Anyway we know that none of you are actually interested in our caviar traumas … just scones, right? scones for the Platinum JubileeWell, they came with a generous tub of strawberry gin jam (I wasn’t driving) and another of clotted cream. The scones were really nice but a little on the big side for our taste. The chances of Charles being on the throne for seventy years are slim to say the least so none of you will ever get to sample a Platinum Jubilee scone ever again. Devastating, we know! In these circumstances we didn’t think it appropriate to categorise them. Good fun though!

meal from Haar for the Platinum Jubilee
In case you are wondering, this is what our Platinum meal looked like

What comes after Platinum?

Crail Harbour Gallery & Tearoom revisited

Salt and pepper pot at the Harbour Gallery CafeLast time we were in the Crail Harbour Gallery & Tearoom was way back in 2018. We hadn’t heard of COVID, Boris was just a joke rather than an elected joke. These were halcyon days! Never mind here we are in 2021 and at least we have the unaccustomed freedom to travel about the country. We are grateful for small mercies such as this. Crail village is picturesque, a favourite among artists. And probably has the most photographed harbour in Scotland. So it’s not entirely surprising that we were drawn back here.

A typical street in Crail
typical Crail street
Much bigger keep please

Last time, we told you the story of the wee boy who had misbehaved back in the 1600s and was thrown in the keep at Balcomie Castle to teach him a lesson. He starved to death because everyone forgot he was there. Tragic but then we wondered who we would like to throw into a keep, The list was so long we decide we would need a bigger keep. Three years later the list has got even bigger. Not only do we have Johnson, Gove, Rees-Mogg and the likes, we now have Cummings, Hancock and most of the DUP, and many more. Much bigger keep please!

View of Crail Harbour
The Crail Harbour Gallery and Tearoom is to the right of this picture with blue shutters

We are very pleased to report that the smoked haddock still adorns the Tolbooth weather vane rather than the traditional cockerel … only in Crail!  After a few purchases at the Pottery we were ready for some lunch and a scone. The tearoom is still run by artist DS Mackie who fills the space with her own works. Internal view of the Harbour Gallery CafeLike last time, we elected to sit outside and take in the panoramic views over the Firth of Forth to the distant Isle of May. A short boat trip will take you there. The puffins and razorbills have no fear and you can just sit down beside them. It’s great!Outside tables at the Harbour Gallery Cafe

Sacrifice, sacrifice!

We were very well looked after by a gentleman who definitely wasn’t local … probably French we thought judging by the accent, the beret and the string of onions round his neck. Just kidding about the beret … and the onions! Our lunch was excellent and the scone came very well presented. Sitting in the sun thinking about puffins, eating scones helped down by some great coffee wasn’t easy. Honestly, the things we do for our readers! The tearoom isn’t big and does very well to maintain all the COVID rules and regulations. Back in 2018 the tearoom just missed out on our topscone award so we were very happy to rectify that this time around. 

A Crail Pottery flowerpot with some Nepeta bought in CeresIn case you’re wondering what we bought at the Pottery, it was just a couple of little wall hanging pots. The plant is the nepeta we bought by chucking money down a chute in Ceres in our previous post. It’s rather nice don’t you think and well worth its 50p cost?

Character

Crail harbour today still supports a few fishing boats but in the past it was at the centre of a bustling trade with Holland and the Low Countries.

A small door in Crail
Folk must have been smaller in the past

Sailing ships would take produce from Crail and return loaded with pantiles as ballast. This gave the East Neuk of Fife its particular character. The orange pantile roofs and the architecture just reek of Dutch influence. That, of course, was when we could trade freely with Europe, something we have just recently lost due to the imbecilic Boris and his merry band of eejits.

Who was first?

The trade with Europe in the 18th century probably gave rise to a ‘nouveau riche’ which in turn resulted in Crail now claiming to have the very first ever golf course in 1786. This may, of course be disputed by neighbouring St Andrews which prides itself as ‘The Home of Golf’. Continuing the sporty theme, last night in the Euros,  England saw off Ukraine in some style with a 4-0 win. Great, however, we are dreading the next unbearable week of infantile speculative rambling about the next semi-final game with Denmark. Keep it in England please … we have scones to eat and puffins to think about!

KY10 3SU         tel: 01333 451896           Harbour Gallery 

PS Also came across this post box while wandering round the village … made in Falkirk!A Carron made post box in Crail

Rufflets

Logo of Rufflets HotelOh dear, what do you do when you have a birthday girl on your hands and you are in lockdown? You can’t go out to buy presents, in fact you can’t go anywhere! But, wait a sec! We can now travel to anywhere in Scotland … it’s official. Okay, they would rather you didn’t but I go back to my original quandary. Suffice to say we are here in St Andrews at Rufflets having done what seemed like a massive road trip to get here. We actually drove for more than an hour … first time in living memory! Okay that’s not that long given our combined memories general state of decrepitude. It did seem like a road trip though … quite thrilling! Anyway, we were having a few days roughing it here at Rufflets. Don’t worry it’s not actually that rough.

Jute

Rufflets was built in 1924 by a local jute baron. In fact, nearby Dundee was once the jute capital of the world. Nowadays most people have never heard of the stuff but back in the good old Empire days we  pilfered loads of the stufExternal view of Rufflets Hotelf from impoverished Bangladeshis. Never mind, with a new Royal Yacht on order, Britain will surely rule the waves once again and go around the globe poking its nose in where it’s not wanted. Or maybe it’s just for Boris and his extensive family to go on holiday with the Rees Moggs? As long as the scones are as good as they were on Britannia we don’t mind,

Rejuvenation

When Rufflets was a private home it must have been magnificent in its ten acres of gardens but since 1952 it has been a hotel and run by the same family ever since.

Pat in the garden at Rufflets Hotel
She didn’t fall in

After all this time in lockdown you can’t beat a few days of pampering and wandering round these beautiful grounds to feel rejuvenated … like COVID had never actually happened. Having to wear a mask when moving around inside the hotel was the only reminder.

Pat in the garden at Rufflets Hotel
The birthday girl desperately trying to act responsibly

We spent a day going round St Andrews. It’s a lovely place but my goodness we hadn’t seen so many people in a long long time. It was busy, busy, busy! Scotland is now in Level One which means that things are almost back to normal but rules about masks and social distancing still apply. Overall, however, the atmosphere is much more relaxed than it’s been for a long time.

Rather than have a scone in town we headed back to Rufflets to see what their scones were like. And, of course, you would also like to know as well, wouldn’t you!

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At last, Scottish jam

Scones at Rufflets HotelWhen the weather is like it is, where better to do some intensive sconology but on the Rufflets terrace. Unsurprisingly perhaps the service was impeccable. We didn’t think it appropriate to ask for cream and sure enough the scones arrived with everything a discerning sconologist  would expect. Starched and ironed linen napkins,  a bowl of clotted cream and Galloway Lodge jam from Gatehouse-of-Fleet. What’s not to like?The scones themselves were crunchy on the outside and soft in the middle, just the way we like them. Again, unsurprisingly we gave them a topscone.Happy girls at Rufflets

Sitting here eating beautiful scones in the beautiful sunshine on a beautiful terrace in a beautiful garden with a beautiful girl, one felt slightly detached from the real world. It’s okay now though …  we’re back!

KY16 9TX         tel: 01334 472594          Rufflets Hotel

///earth.agreement.trappings

PS: You all know our Australian Bathurst correspondents by now. Together with the New South Welshman they have kept us abreast of sconological events down under for the past couple of years. When it has been difficult to go on scone adventures in the UK they have provided us with invaluable additional posts. However, you probably don’t know that part of their family lives here in Scotland.  

The past couple of years have been particularly difficult for them since they have been unable to visit their grandchildren due to COVID. Their daughter lives only a mile or so away from Rufflets with her husband and two daughters. We hadn’t met them before but decided to just barge in and introduce ourselves. What an absolute pleasure that turned out to be! They are the warmest kindest people … obviously something to do with the stock they come from!Rebecca and Dave at the Tavern I even had my first post-lockdown pint of Guinness  in the Tavern at Strathkinness (pronounced Strathkinis I was reliably informed by a chap at the bar).

Wishful thinking

Anyway our stay at Rufflets has come to an end. We have emerged back into the real world to find that the G7 have found a way to get large multinationals to pay their fair share of tax. After years of saying its couldn’t be done it only took a couple of hours over dinner to get it sorted.  Brilliant, maybe if the G7 had a scone on the terrace here at Rufflets they could sort out a whole lot more pressing global problems?

Balgove Larder

When we got an email from our ever inventive Bathurst correspondent entitled “scones and phone boxes” we were delighted. Always keen to learn more about life down under we were full of anticipation. Perhaps another New South Wale’s scone? Perhaps a kangaroo outside a K6 phone box somewhere in the outback? So imagine our surprise when we discovered that nothing could be further from the truth. The scone news came from the Balgove Larder in St Andrews, about an hour’s drive from where we live and the telephone boxes were all local too i.e. in the UK. Who would have thought we would be getting our local sconological news from the antipodeas?

Strange things happen

Of course, there’s an explanation. Our correspondent has family near St Andrews and the pictures were from his last visit, about two years ago. Is getting local news like this weird or wonderful? We think it’s wonderful but it may also be a bit weird. Our correspondent laments the fact that he has no idea if and when he will again be allowed to visit St Andrews where his daughter and grandchildren live. Weirdly, even though it is very close to us, we are not allowed to visit either. Such are the joys of global coronavirus restrictions!

A scone at Balgove LarderIf memory serves our correspondent well, Balgove Larder was a lovely venue and the scone was also excellent. It certainly looks good and nicely presented with plenty jam and cream. Oviously Pat and I will do our utmost to confer a grading here as soon as we are allowed to travel again. Oooo, “conferring” topscone awards … sounds a bit pretentious doesn’t it. Note to self: must stay grounded!

Lunar outbursts

While the UK adjusts to renewed lockdown apparently President Trump has reported a huge dump of his votes on the moon. He has a friend who is an astronaut, a terrific astronaut, he has a telescope and he has seen them. Now, dear reader, if you wondered, even for a nanosecond, if that was true it pretty much sums up the state of American politics at the moment. Sad, sad! If Trump loses we may even miss these extraordinary outbursts. We can adjust, however. 

KY16 9SF         tel: 01334 898145        Balgove

///ripen.hotel.class

ps: Not content with simply sending us Scottish scone news from Australia our correspondent also sent some phone box pics.

K6 phone ones from Bathurst correspondent
Julie demonstrating how a remote Welsh K6 door works near Tregaron and a St Andrews Lion K6 on the right in Hepburn Gardens with our correspondents grandchildren Molly and Annie

Lo-and-behold, no sooner had our Bathurst correspont sent in his report than another one popped up … wow! This one described an autumn walk our Devon correspondents took the other day. No scones but they did spot this phone box in the village of Filleigh. Readers all know by now that we regard Devon folks as being fairly uncivilised. Goodness, cream first, what do they expect?

Filleigh K6 in Devon
A Devon K6 and some beautiful autumn colours

If further proof was needed here is the picture they sent of a Devon ‘red’ telephone box. It’s used as the village library.

We are, as always, indebted to each and every one of our correspondents. They enrich our lives (and hopefully yours) wonderfully.

The Canny Soul

All hail Lady Hale. She has shown our Prime Minister to be an absolute bounder.  Some think her large spider brooch, was worn to illustrate what a tangled web we weave, however, she has unwittingly launched a whole new fashion movement. Who’d have thought they would have sold 5000 t-shirts sporting her brooch design within hours of it appearing?

Quite a month

Anyway, September has been quite a month for the UK. The Queen has been found to have meddled in the Scottish independence referendum of 2014. Much has been made in the press of the Palace’s disquiet at this being made public by David Cameron. Not a mention, however, of the disquiet of the people of Scotland who have known the Queen was set up for the past five years.

Dysfunctional

Now she’s embroiled in BoJo’s deceit over the prorogation of Parliament. Bad enough having a dysfunctional family to deal with, now she has a load of dysfunctional politicians as well. Who would be a Royal?

Internal view of the Canny Soul café in St AndrewsThe lesson we have taken from the Supreme Court’s ruling is that doing things unlawfully is okay. Pat and I have decided to start mugging people in an effort to enhance our meagre pensions. Yes, we know it’s unlawful but what the hell? If it’s good enough for Boris, surely it’s good enough for us too. St Andrews seemed like a good place to start. Lots of wealthy folk and stacks of American tourists.  Of course St Andrews is a university town (2nd best after Cambridge) so it’s brimming with students. We knew that there would be slim pickings mugging them … too poor and too fit. It would be the easiest thing in the world for them to run away from us.

Sign for the Canny Soul café in St AndrewsNo, we really needed to find people with walking sticks, or zimmers, preferably. Spotting likely victims is harder than you might think, however. After a while we were tired and found ourselves standing outside the Canny Soul café. We ended up not mugging anyone or, indeed, doing anything unlawful and going for a scone instead. Is that a huge collective sigh of relief we can hear? However, had we been caught mugging someone we would simply have explained that we disagreed it was unlawful. It works for Boris!

Definition of a Canny Soul

It turns out there is more to this place than meets the eye because, on the face of it, it’s not much to look at. Apparently a “canny soul” is someone who is: “neither above you or below you but is always by your side”. It’s a kind of lifestyle choice.

Picture of Marilyn Munro at the Canny Soul café in St Andrews
Marilyn Munro

One that was borne out by the place itself. All the staff were very happy and obliging. We’re not sure if this picture, which was prominent in the café, is of a “canny soul” but if Boris can learn to simper like this then he will probably get away with even more than he’s getting away with at the moment.

Sucking up

Everything we had was fine, however, our scones did not quite cut it. They seemed a wee bit tasteless. A scone at the Canny Soul café in St AndrewsNo topscone but the friendly atmosphere in the Canny Soul more than made up for it. They were indeed, canny souls. During some banter when we were leaving I complimented the middle aged owner on his youthful energy. He looked at me and said “ you have aged like a bottle of fine wine, I have aged like a bottle of milk!” Ten out of ten for observation … and sucking up to customers! Perhaps Boris should do a bit more sucking up rather than simply blustering blindly towards a no deal Brexit. He might even consider becoming a canny soul … or have we taken that too far?

The government has had to spend £billions repatriating holiday makers  after Thomas Cook’s  collapse and now Trump is being impeached. The world has gone mad … or madder! We still had a very enjoyable time in St Andrews however.

KY16 9QW     tel: 07712 423386       The Canny Soul TA

///liberated.rejoined.slept

Crail Harbour Gallery

Back around the middle of the 16th century the union between Scotland and France was very strong. It was founded on the understanding that Scottish royalty would marry French royalty and vice versa. To this end James V married Madeleine of Valois in Paris in 1537. Later that year, as Queen Madeleine, she arrived in Leith amidst great celebration. Six months later, however, she died. Never mind, within a year James married another French princess, Mary of Guise. She was shipped over to Scotland together with some 2,000 lords and barons. Bet you thought mail-order brides were a relatively recent phenomenon!

Miscalculations

She was supposed to land at St Andrews but due to a miscalculation by the captain, she landed at Crail instead. Her first night in Scotland was at Balcomie Castle. All was well however because, when she eventually did cover the last ten miles to St Andrews, there followed several days of bounteous merriment. She, of, course would eventually become mother to Mary Queen of Scots. The rest, as they say, is history. External view of Crail Harbour Gallery and Tearoom

This slightly verbose introduction is simply to say that today we are in Crail, a beautiful little fishing village on the East Neuk of Fife. Apparently, at one time, it could easily be mistaken for St Andrews if looking at it through squinty eyes from the sea. Just up the hill from the harbour we came across the Crail Harbour Gallery and Tearoom. It owes its existence to the artist D S MacKie. He converted the 17th century storage space into a gallery for his own work. Internal view of Crail Harbour Gallery and Tearoom

That time of year

The interior is small but it has an even smaller garden area where you can sit and take in fabulous sea views. View from Crail Harbour Gallery and Tearoom towards Isle of MayOn a lovely sunny day like this  it was glorious to sit out. However we were eventually driven inside by wasps … it’s that time of year again, shame.

The girls looking after us were very warm and welcoming. They took our random table changes in their stride though they were probably cursing us under their breath. A light lunch was, of course, followed by a scone which we shared. A scone at Crail Harbour Gallery and TearoomIt came nicely presented with everything you would want for a good scone, plus, a little piece of Scottish tablet on the side. We will eat healthy tomorrow … honest! The scone was very enjoyable and because of the great service and presentation we swithered hard about a topscone. Eventually we decided that the scone itself just didn’t quite do it … pity!

One of the many noteable things about Crail is the weathervane on the Tolbooth building. Rather than the cockerel of weather vane tradition, it is a smoked haddock … fab!

View of Crail Harbour
The Gallery and Tearoom is to the right of this picture

Balcomie Castle where Queen Mary spent her first night is also haunted by a small boy who misbehaved about 400 years ago. They threw him in the keep for a few hours to teach him a lesson but went away forgetting about him. He starved to death!

Bigger keep please

We can think of a few politicians who could do with a few hours in the keep. However, just when you are trying to pick one: May, Johnstone, Corbyn, Rees Mogg, Trump, Australia has to go and get in on the act. Their own chaotic elections have produced a brand new shiny PM, Scott Morrison! We really are spoiled for choice. We need a bigger keep!

KY10 3SU     tel: 01333 451896     Crail Gallery and Tearoom

Marco Pierre White

Poster of Marco and Gordon Ramsay at Marco Pierre White Steakhouse, GlasgowWe all know, from watching them on TV, that top chefs can be a bit unpredictable, a bit temperamental, even a bit rude. Gordon Ramsay, famous for his ability to reduce the most stoical underlings to quivering, weeping emotional wrecks with his bombastic tirades, is arguably the rudest of them all. One other chef however managed to reduce Ramsay to tears – Marco Pierre White. It’s what happens when two massive egos collide, someone has got to come off second best. The reason for their emotional outbursts, of course, is their constant search for perfection.

So we don’t think it is unreasonable to expect that the winner between these two would produce nothing but the most exquisite food. Maybe even a exquisite scone? However, he is of course French and while we all know these continental types do great croissants … what about scones? Ooh la la, would this be where the mighty Marco finally meets his Waterloo. The restaurant is in Glasgow’s Waterloo Street after all? Interior view of Marco Pierre White Steakhouse, Glasgow

Walking the relatively short distance from Queen Street station to the restaurant brings home to you just what a pathetic state the UK is in. Not only are we bombarded with urgent tv and radio appeals for toys to give to the millions of children who won’t have any this Christmas . Or for money or food for food banks, but we also get the tragedies of Aleppo, Sana’a and the NHS thrown at us constantly. Why does this walk give rise to such a rant? Because, on this cold wet day, we had to virtually step over eight beggars to get to our rather swish restaurant.

Wretched poor

How can this situation exist in the 4th richest nation in the world? Afternoon tea at Marco Pierre White Steakhouse, GlasgowCould it be that most of the riches in the UK are held by the top 1%. The Lords and Knights of this precious realm. The ones who continually kowtow to the House of Saud and anyone else who will cut them a deal? Years after Thatcher’s death it is amazing that her shadow still stretches so far. Just as well there is no such thing as ‘society’! We were here for afternoon tea. Being greeted with a glass of champagne helped wash away memories of the wretched poor and readied us for our sandwiches, cakes … and scones!

Standards Marco!

Our middle tier consisted of two rather large scones, some chantilly cream and a pot of raspberry jam. Now we had the answer to whether a frenchman, a french chef of Marco Pierre White’s international standing no less, could bake a lowly scone! Now we are not silly. We know that he probably did not personally bake these particular scones. Since the whole place trades on his name, however, we are treating it as if he did. Sadly the answer has to be, no, he couldn’t. Beyond his ken! Top tier of afternoon tea at Marco Pierre White Steakhouse, Glasgow

Admittedly he made a pretty good stab at it but it was a million miles away from ‘exquisite’ and by no means what you might expect in such an establishment. Too big for a start. An afternoon tea should really consist of petite delicacies suitable for ‘ladies’. Not great clodhopping things like this! They tasted okay, if a bit sweet and cakey in flavour and texture.  Also for a place like this you would not expect jam to come as these supermarket off-the-shelf pots … standards Marco, standards! In spite of the slightly disappointing scones we thoroughly enjoyed our visit. Very relaxing and looked after beautifully.

Service charges

We just hope that Marco, unlike fellow frenchman André Roux whose establishments don’t pass on any of the 15% service charge, does the decent thing by his staff. Not sharing the service charge with the people it is intended for is just sooo ‘money-grabbing modern’. Oh dear, out amongst the rain and the beggars again!

Christmas lights in George Square, Glasgow 2016
Festive lights in George Square

G2 7DA   tel: 0141 226 7726    Marco Pierre White Steakhouse

ps It’s that time of year again when people see all sorts of strange images in everyday things …. e.g. Jesus on a slice of toast! Last weekend we attended a soiree at our local Dobbie Hall. It was great fun and we met lots of friends we had not seen in ages. Picture of a teddy bear scone from St AndrewsOne such friend informed me that he had a picture of a teddy bear scone he had come across in St Andrews. Obviously I was intrigued … but he refused to let me see it until I danced with him. It was only after a vibrant and steamy Argentine Tango that he finally coughed up and sent it to my phone. I had to admit that it did have something of a teddy bear about it. Though obviously it would have been better without its body chopped in half. You can be the judge. Okay, I lied about the Argentine Tango. It wasn’t that vibrant … or steamy! Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year.

The Woodhouse

For those of you who know the tiny community of Kinlochard, here’s a question. What would a group of fifty Russians and Greeks be doing in the village? While you are cogitating let us tell you why we are here. As if our Trossachs correspondents don’t do enough, scouring places like Gibraltar and Lithuania for scones, they very kindly invited us to a ‘Scottish night’ at the village hall. They have already had very successful Indian and Italian nights. What a night it was! Excellent Scottish themed food and drink, and even better company.

Just walking the half mile from the house to the hall was exciting. Us townies tend to forget what ‘dark’ means until you are in a place like this. It’s dark! Goodness knows how Rob Roy and his merry band got around without iPhone torches! Unlike larger towns and cities, little places like Kinlochard certainly know how to generate community spirit. And it’s a really nice experience. There were no Russians or Greeks at our night however.

View across Loch Ard with Ben Lomond in the distance
Loch Ard with Ben Lomond in the distance

The Moss

The next day was beautiful. After a wee walk round the village we had to head for home  but decided to visit Flanders Moss on the way. Having attended a fascinating Scottish Wildlife Trust talk about the Moss the previous week we thought we should check it out. Again, it is one of these places that you know of as one of Scotland’s chief defences against the English in times gone by and as a place you drive past frequently. Not as a place you actually ever visit.

View from the viewing tower at Flanders Moss
part of Flanders Moss with Ben Lomond on the left and Ben Ledi on the right

Strictly Come Sconing

It’s a designated National Nature Reserve and now it has a magnificent high viewing platform that provides a brilliant vantage point looking out towards Aberfoyle and the Lake of Menteith. Don’t think there is any connection with Flanders in Belgium. The name seems to be a corruption of an old gaelic word. On the edge of the Moss near to Kippen you come to The Woodhouse. Another of these café farm shops that seem to be popping up everywhere. Interior view of the Woodhouse Café, KippenYou would think there would be a cut-off point where there were too many and they would become  unsustainable? Not yet, they all seem to be really busy and

The Woodhouse is no exception. After our walk, lunch was definitely order of the day however there was no way we could pass up the chance of a scone test so that you, dear sconeys, can know that on your own visit to Flanders Moss it is safe to come here for sustenance. The things we do!

They are quite big so we decided to share one between the four of us … one of the biggest testing panels we have ever assembled. A sort of scone version of Strictly. Scones at the Woodhouse Café, KippenThe tea and scone was presented beautifully with an eclectic range of crockery. And with locally produced butter and cream as well as homemade strawberry jam – four 10s so far. Taste was excellent as well so, without too much deliberation it was declared a topscone. Well done The Woodhouse!

St Andrews day

Oh yes, the Russians and Greeks! They were in Kinlochard for a St Andrew’s night dinner … St Andrew, of course, being the patron saint of Russia and Greece as well as Scotland … but you all knew that! Quite why they should find themselves in Kinlochard however is still a bit of a mystery. Earlier today, St Andrew’s Day, the Prime Minister made a speech saying how proud she was of everything Scottish (the oil price is soaring) while simultaneously Angus Robertson was jeered for wishing the Commons a happy St Andrew’s day. Just have a great day everyone!Cake display at the Woodhouse Café, Kippen

FK8 3JA       tel: 01786 870156        The Woodhouse FB