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These are the best scones we have found so far.

The Courtyard Café revisited

18th August 2022 billpaterson1@me.com 5 Comments

The last time we were here at the Courtyard Café in Fintry was in 2016. Back then we said we liked everything about the place and that we would love to come back … so we have. This is ‘the Courtyard Cafe revisited’, would it still be as good?

Quite often we just get in the car and see where it takes us. Today is one these days. We took the road to Carron Valley which as well as being a lovely drive is also Falkirk’s water supply. In spite of the dire warns of impending disaster down south due to drought, the reservoir looked pretty full to us. We were reassured.

Not far beyond the end of the reservoir you come to Fintry a lovely little village nestling in the Campsie Fells.

Waterloo and all that

Remarkably, the village has a connection to Napoleon and the Battle of Waterloo. Over 200 years ago, Peter McNee, a local teacher, was concerned about the living conditions of the local mill workers. He protested so loudly, he was eventually obliged to leave Britain and settle in France. There he changed his name, joined the army and quickly rose through the ranks. As Marshall Ney he became Napoleon’s right hand man. After Waterloo he was executed by firing squad in spite of Wellington pleading for clemency. Rumour has it, though, that his death may have been faked. Gosh, he might be in the café?

Internal view of the Courtyard Café, Fintry — The shop area where they sell their own milk, ice cream and other farm produce

Once you have parked and walked past the neat orchard and the beautiful chicken enclosure you just get the feeling that this is a well run place.

Wallpaper at the Courtyard Café, Fintry — Wallpaper at the Courtyard

Our window at the Courtyard Café, Fintry — The window at out table … the walls must be a metre thick!

It was going like a fair but they managed to find a table for us quite quickly. We had noticed on the way in that the scones were quite big so we decided to share … but only after a delicious light lunch. When our scone arrived I was a bit disappointed. It looked a little bit on the solid side. What do I know? It was fab! The texture was great and the whole thing was incredibly light. Along with plenty jam and cream it was an easy topscone. We will be back!

Questions

We left Fintry and decided to go home via Kippen where we visited the Rhubarb & Lime Coffee Shop. We reviewed it in 2016 as well. It was just the same, friendly people, and after buying a couple of bottles of Italian wine we were on the road again. On the way I thought it would be a good idea to get off the main road and go through some of the local villages. We turned off the A811 into what was signposted as Glinnes Road. Almost immediately it turned into single track with passing places. Undeterred we kept on going even though it was obvious we were heading in the wrong direction for home. Then there was grass in the middle of the road. Pat asked “where exactly are we going?” Always difficult when you have no idea. She’s asked the question many times before and is still waiting on a satisfactory answer.

Pat opening gate on Glinne's Road — My trusty helper opens the first of several gates

Eventually, many bumpy miles later, we emerged into Balfron, a village we’ve never visited before. Needless to say, there are much easier ways to get there. Just before we reached the village we came across Lou’s Bake Stop. Lots of fresh baking, coffee and cold drinks … just leave the money in the basket … fab! We like these honesty places.

Honesty

Scotland has just had the pleasure of a visit from Liz Truss, one of the contenders to become PM of the UK. She promised to work flat out for Scotland. This, in spite of saying a week before that the best thing to do with Scotland’s elected representatives was to ignore them. Maybe she should spend some time in Lou’s Honesty Hut.

We got home. We always get home … eventually!

G63 0LN tel: 01360 860132 The Courtyard

///ballots.plump.exists

Scones, Top

Murrayshall House

1st August 2022 billpaterson1@me.com 3 Comments

After our disastrous non-scone in our previous post from Patricia’s Coffee Bar in Glasgow we thought we should try and do something to redeem ourselves. So, what better way on a scone blog than to come to Scone itself. Now a word of warning to those unaware of the nuances of Scottish pronunciation. When you see ‘scone’ as in ‘scone blog’ it is pronounced ‘scone,’ as in ‘gone’. However when you see ‘Scone’ as in the village of ‘Scone’, it is pronounced ‘skoon’ as in ‘soon’. Murrayshall House is on the outskirts of the village.

No mean feat!

Just to the west is the village of Old Scone where all the Kings of Scotland used to be crowned. They would sit on the Stone of Scone, a large rectangular block of sandstone carved with a Celtic cross. It is perhaps better known as the Stone of Destiny. In 1296 Edward I stole it and placed it in Westminster Abbey as a throne for English Kings … how very dare they!! However, in 1950 a group of plucky Scottish students ‘repatriated’ it back to Scotland and created a right royal rumpus in the process. It weighs 152kg so no mean feat.

A year or so later the police found it in Arbroath and replaced in Westminster Abbey. However, there are doubts regarding its authenticity. Some think a copy had been made and deliberately left in Arbroath to be found. The real stone, of course, still being at large. If it isn’t authentic does that make any coronation created on it, null and void? Interesting!

Borrowers

The last monarch to use the real one was Elizabeth I of Scotland, sometimes known outside of Scotland as Elizabeth II. After much protest In Scotland, the UK government grudgingly agreed that the stone should be located back to where it belonged. There was a proviso, however, that they get it back for future coronations. It currently resides in Edinburgh Castle alongside the Scottish Crown Jewels. Next year it’s supposed to be moved again. This time to Perth … almost back in Scone.

Enough about stones, what about the scones at Murrayshall House. Hopefully they would not bear any resemblance to the Stone of Scone.

The house is certainly rather grand and has views over the Perthsire countryside to match .

27?

It was built in 1664 and was home to numerous Lords, Barons, Earls, Viscounts and other chinless wonders until the 1970s when it was turned into a hotel. The previous owners, poor dears, had to move to nearby Scone Palace. Nowadays, riffraff like us are allowed over the doorstep. The grounds at Murrayshall are lovely and extensive enough to easily accommodate a 27 hole golf course…is that not too many holes?

Our room came complete with a grand piano, though with everyone experiencing staff shortages due to Brexit, there was no one playing it. The young girl looking after us was very pleasant and soon had us sorted with a fandangled contraption bearing our afternoon tea. There was plenty of sandwiches, quiches and cakes alongside a separate plate bearing four scones. Often, in places like this you get a tea menu but not here. It was just plain ordinary tea, take it or leave it … and that’s just fine by us. Needless to say there was much more food than our tiny tummies could accommodate. We had to pace ourselves on the sandwiches in order to leave room for the scones.

They were really nice and came with little pots of Scottish jam … yegh! The clotted cream, however, was made by a Dutch company in England?? There were a few downsides to this afternoon tea but we eventually decided that the scones just scraped into the topscone category. Well done Murrayshall House.

The library at Murrayshall House — the library

Rwanda and Eurovision

The Commonwealth Games have started amidst great celebration in Birmingham. We were more than a little surprised, however, to learn that Rwanda is competing. Especially since that country has never had the pleasure of being part of the great British Empire. Seems on a par with Australia competing in the Eurovision Song Contest. Maybe Rwanda will be able to take part in that too? Since the cornerstone of Commonwealth membership is human rights, Rwanda’s inclusion is even more puzzling. Could it be linked in any way to Westminster’s decision to send refugees and asylum seekers to Rwanda just to get rid of them? Perish the thought!

Never mind all that, we just feel sorry for the poor sods who, on reaching the 18th hole here, find they still have another nine to go. And … talk about destiny, England have just won the football at the Women’s EURO 2022, so there’s something to talk about for the next fifty years. Well done England! You can have the Stone back for Charles’s coronation but only if you ask nicely!

PH2 7PH 01738 55 11 71 Murrayshall House Hotel

///fault.pheasants.scam

Scones, Top

Prestonfield House

24th July 2022 billpaterson1@me.com 7 Comments

This place is described as opulent, eccentric, flamboyant, cosseted, and decadent, does that sound like our kind of place? Of course it does! Obviously, these are all words that could easily be ascribed to ourselves never mind Prestonfield House! We’ve been here several times before. It’s not exactly our ‘local’ but if we were as wealthy as an Arab sheik or a Tory politician, it might be.

Now we have the last two contenders left in the race to ruin the UK … Sunak and Truss. Both ardent Thatcherites and Brexiteers.

Not that they would care, but that’s not going to get them very far in Scotland. Here, the word “Thatcher” is usually expressed like some sort of swear word and Brexit is regarded as an unmitigated disaster. Did you know that the nickname ‘Tories’ originated in the 16th century in Ireland and derives from the Gaelic word ‘toraidhe’ meaning plunderer, robber, thief, barbarian and yobbo. Just saying!

As “Priestfield” its history dates back to the 12th century but in 1681 it was burned to the ground by anti-Catholic rioters who objected to the name. What are folk like? It was rebuilt six years later and the name changed to “Prestonfield.” It became a hotel in the 1960s and in 2003 it was bought by restaurateur, James Thomson. He owns the atmospheric Witchery by the Castle restaurant and much of the sumptuousness of Prestonfield is largely due to him.

External view of Prestonfield House — one half of the Rhubarb restaurant

It started with a post

This is the quintessential Edinburgh place to indulge and celebrate. So what are you two doing there you’re wondering?

Rhubarb was introduced to Scotland here and now adornes their plates

Well, we can hardly believe it ourselves, but this is our 500th post on allabouttthescones.com. How mad is that? Perhaps, even madder, is that so many of you have been with us as budding bloggers right from the start. That was at Palmerston’s Coffee Shop in Dunkeld back in early 2015 … incredible! We are sure you would agree that such an auspicious occasion deserves to be marked in some way. Why not a scone at Prestonfield House eased down with some Billecart Salmon champagne? We can do decadent!

Good company

Drawing room at Prestonfield House — one of the drawing rooms

We decided to have our afternoon tea in one of the drawing rooms rather than the famous Rhubarb restaurant. A good decision as it happens because we had the company of three lovely Scandinavian girls on their first trip to Scotland … talk about doing it in style!

Eating rotten things

We don’t normally like the sort of formal subservient service you can sometimes get in places such as this however the young chap who was looking after us was delighfult.

He was Spanish and had been here six years. He explained everything we were getting in great detail but with such a strong accent that we really didn’t catch much of it. No matter it all looked fantabulous, the sight of it was quite enough, . One three tier stand with sandwiches on the bottom, cakes on top and scones in the middle. In addition there was a separate plate of savoury goods which included some haggis treats. Only one of our new found Scandinavian friends dared take a little nibble. Goodness, did they not know the celebrated status of haggis in Scotland … and these Viking types eat rotten fish, don’t they?

Anyway it probably will come as no surprise to all you sconeys to learn that this was a topscone. We weren’t able to eat all of them because we felt they were a bit on the large side for an afternoon tea, but that was our only criticism. They were beautifully soft with that crunchy exterior we love. lots of jam and clotted cream as well.

Barefoot

We didn’t think we would ever mention Thatcher twice in one post but she dined here, as did Churchill and a host of other celebrities. More importantly perhaps, Sandie Shaw once strode barefoot across these marble floors.

Deluded as Trump

Boris says that he will be back as PM within a year … we’ll have a pint of whatever he’s drinking! Folks who worked alongside him when he was with the Telegraph say he just made stuff up for his column. Who would have thought it? And although they knew what he was writing was completely false, the newspaper never once offered a retraction. Says it all about British politicians and media.

Colin for PM

The last time we were here they had a lot of peacocks roosting in the trees however we were told there is only one left now … Colin. We went to look for Colin to tell him that we would rather see him running the country than any of the current contenders. We couldn’t find him…opportunity missed!

path leading to stables at Prestonfield House — The path leading to the Stables … no horses these days, it’s an events venue

Can we do another 500 scones? We’ll see!

EH16 5UT tel: 0131 225 7800 Prestonfield House

///lance.civil.notice

Scones, Top

Gleneagles

5th July 2022 billpaterson1@me.com 7 Comments

Gosh, it’s a month since our last post about the Platinum Jubilee. Apologies to those who have been patiently waiting … and to those who have been enjoying the peace and quiet. We thought we should start again in style so we’ve come to Gleneagles.

View from Gleneagles Hotel — View over Glendevon from the Glendevon Room

A Highland Playground

Gleneagles is one of these places, like the Connaught and Claridges, that doesn’t need to bother putting ‘hotel’ after its name. You’re just supposed to know. It’s the playground of the rich and famous. So what on earth are you doing there, we hear you ask? Okay, did you know that Gleneagles has three Championship golf courses and one nine hole course. Surely that’s way more than enough? Did you know that it has a Shooting & Fishing School an Equestrian Centre and the British School of Falconry. Did you know that it hosted the G8 summit in 2005 with the likes of Blair, Putin, Berlusconi, Bush and Chirac? All largely forgotten, apart from one, of course. That was before G8 became G7 after Russia was suspended in 2014 for being a bad boy and invading Crimea. Goodness, that seems like a relatively minor misdemeanour now!

The Glendevon at the Gleneagles Hotel — The Glendevon Room, the scene of the G8 dinner hosted y the Queen …. and now our scone

Of course, none of that is of any interest to us, we are only here for the scones. Having said that, we also have a very special Canadian with us (Pat’s brother) who we are determined to introduce the genteel refining intricacies of taking afternoon tea. You know what those Canadians are like … bit rough around the edges! What better place to do it than this? If they can’t do a decent afternoon tea here then there is precious little hope left for the world. Okay, he only wanted to be out on one of the golf courses rather than doing this but, much to his dismay, we stuck to our guns.

Friendly service

There are over 1000 staff servicing the 232 rooms so expectations were high in terms of service. We were not to be disappointed. In fact, in many ways our expectations were exceeded.

Cakes at Gleneagles Hotel — top tier of the sweet stand

The staff looking after us, of which there were many, were all great. Not only did they take the time to explain all the sandwiches and other delicacies we were getting but also took the time to answer our questions about the hotel and all the people who have stayed there. Some, even more famous than us! As you can imagine, a stay at Gleneagles is not exactly cheap, quite the reverse. So the staff were impressed to hear that my dad had been a guest here for six months. Eventually I had to divulge that it was when the hotel had been turned into a hospital during WWII. He was recuperating after a bad motorcycle accident.

The ballroom at Gleneagles Hotel — the Ballroom but no dancing today

Anyway, back to the scones. Forgive us if we go In to slightly more detail than usual. Before you get anything here they give you a little champagne glass into which they pour some iced tea … very nice. That’s followed by an amuse bouche of tomato consommé … very nice again. Then they bring the savoury three tier stand BOTTOM TIER Perthshire smoked salmon with sweet dill mayonnaise sandwich + egg mayonnaise with mustard cress sandwich + Tweed valley roast beef with nasturtium butter sandwich. MIDDLE TIER vol-au-vent with red onion marmalade, goats cheese broad bean, radish, carrot and candied walnut + toasted pickelet with white crab meat and creme fraiche + Hardwick lamb sausage roll with lovage emulsion and choucroute. TOP TIER pea, cabbage and potato croquette + toasted charcoal baguette with pickled cucumber smoked trout and golden beetroot. No scones!

Peachy

Then, only then, when you have stuffed yourself with all this deliciousness do they bring out the next three tier sweet stand. Argh! But at last we caught our first sight of the “soft and fluffy” buttermilk scones. Would we have room for them let alone everything else? The scones were indeed soft and fluffy as described but with a slight crunchiness as well … perfect. They came with loads of jam and clotted cream, all beautifully presented. A very easy topscone. Sitting here in our secluded little alcove gazing out across the croquet lawn to the sunlit hills of Glendevon you could easily think that everything is absolutely peachy with the world. You would be completely wrong, of course, but just for a moment …

Needless to say we could not get near finishing everything that we had been presented with … even when it was washed down with copious quantities of Glendevon blend tea. And this being Gleneagles, even our ‘doggy bags’ were posh. A custom made handbag style box in which we could transport our leftovers back home. Did our Canadian feel enlightened by this experience? Of course he did … a “soft and fluffy” scone at Gleneagles … who wouldn’t be?

PH3 1NF tel: 01764 662231 Gleneagles Hotel

///claim.facing.showcases

ps: if there is anywhere in Scotland that can rival Gleneagles for culinary expertise and originality it is the Oystercatcher restaurant in the lovely little village of Portmahomack. And guess what, our Trossachs correspondents are on the loose again and that’s exactly where they are. As well as a fabulous dinner the previous evening they sent us a picture of their breakfast … Scallops-o-Scone.

Scallops-O-Scone at the Oystercatcher, Portmahomack — Scallops-O-Scone at the Oystercatcher

They also reported on a scone they enjoyed in the company of members of the Portmahomack Salsa Drumming Band in the Carnegie Hall Cafe. The last time we reviewed this place was back in 2016 … too long ago.

Our correspondents sound like they are having a brilliant time … we need to go back.

Scones, Top

Branksome Beach Café

10th May 2022 billpaterson1@me.com 4 Comments

First leg of our road trip completed, we couldn’t get a more extreme contrast between our last post from Tebay Services and this place, Branksome Beach Café. One set amongst wild rugged moorland and the other on a beach looking out towards the Isle of Wight.

A different life

We are visiting our daughter’s new house. It’s big compared to the tiny one her and her family had in London and it’s in a very quiet street in a beautiful forested area. Without having to go on any roads at all you can take Branksome Chine (a very pretty wooded gully) down to the beach. The path drops you out right at Branksome Beach Café … how neat is that?

View from Branksome Beach — View from our seat on an overcast but warm day. France just over the horizon

Indoor beaches

In the 1930s Branksome Beach Café was Britain’s first functioning solarium. Intended to provide a year round sunbatheing facility it had an indoor beach complete with deckchairs behind huge glass windows. Now the sand and deckchairs have long gone and it has developed into one of Dorset’s landmark cafés. It also makes a claim to be the home of the rock cake! My mother made rock cakes in such a way that you never had to question how they got their name.

External view of Branksome Beach — Bill board outside the café and an actually rock cake … neither to scale

Such a claim obviously requires testing so we got a one to share with everyone at our table. Whether the claim is true or not doesn’t really matter .. it was delicious and not too rock like! Luckily, they are not claiming to be the home of the scone … that would be simply ridiculous!

Local produce

Of course, we had to test the scones. We were sitting outside on the terrace overlooking the beach but on the way in we had noticed the scones. They were quite big so having already scoffed some rock cake we opted to share one. It came complete with a pot of jam and the ubiquitous Rodda’s Cornish Cream. Since we are relatively near Cornwall we have dropped our customary objection … it’s a local product down here!.We’re sure that the excellent service, the views out over the beach and the sea were all contributory factors in our decision to award a topscone. Well done Branksome Beach Café.

Prince Charles substituted for the Queen today at the State Opening of Parliament. It said nothing and perhaps the biggest news was that Kate, Duchess of Cambridge had travelled to Manchester on a charter flight in a Michael Kors outfit. Goodness, she’s almost common! Somehow all the pomp and pageantry seems hugely incongruous in times where more and more people are being forced to use food banks. Not that we have much room to talk, sitting here eating rock cakes and scones by the beach.

BH13 6LP tel: BH13 6LP Branksome

///water.singer.cared

ps: our fabulous Toowoomba correspondents have sent us scone pictures from Angie’s Country cafe in Toogoolawah. Hands up everyone who knows where that is! Okay not too many.Presentation looks good as does the scone so if you ever find yourselves in Toogoolawah you know where to go.

Scones, Top, topweird

The Hidden Lane Tearoom

2nd April 2022 billpaterson1@me.com 3 Comments

Here we are in Glasgow, the bestest city in the whole wide world … Pat told me that! We are looking for something that’s hidden. Why? It’s like an itch, you’ve got to scratch it. If you are told something is hidden you feel an overpowering urge to find it. So it was with the Hidden Lane Tearoom.

The Hidden Lane — Looking down the Hidden Lane from Argyle Street

Argyle Street is more than two miles long and one of Glasgow’s main shopping streets. There is so much going on you could easily walk past this little lane and not even notice it. Even if you did, you might not feel particularly inclined to go down … it’s not immediately obvious that it leads to anything. It’s proper name is Argyle Court but not a lot of people know that. You would just get a blank look if you asked for it by anything other than ‘the hidden lane.’ When you reach the end of the lane, however, it suddenly opens up into a large courtyard with a veritable cornucopia of tiny little shops and eateries. It’s quite a big area but this narrow lane is the only way in or out. Who would have thought?

Exciting

Even then, the tearoom was not immediately obvious but then we spotted it tucked away in a corner. It has become a central focus amongst the brightly coloured higgledy piggledy studios which act as home to lots of musicians and other creatives. We were excited to find the Hidden Lane but we were doubly excited to try the tearoom. Apparently it’s renowned for its luxury afternoon tea, its classic Victoria sponge and its secret recipe scones. What’s not to get excited about?

The tearoom has a cosy chintzy feel about and combined with the cheery service it’s the sort of place where you immediately feel comfortable. They have an upstairs as well so it’s not as small as you might think. Of course, our primary concern was the scones. Pat went for fruit and I opted for their ‘special scone of the day,’ raspberry and white chocolate.

Double awards

I tried to get a picture of both scones together but for some reason it didn’t work. Damn, just when I thought I was getting the hang of this photography lark! Anyway we shared the scones so that we could sample both. Unsurprisingly perhaps, we thought they were both excellent. Served with little glass pots of jam and cream and a sprinkling of crunchy sugar on top. We gave Pat’s a topscone and mine a top weird scone … well done the Hidden Lane Tearoom.

Who would have thought that, more than a month on, the war in Ukraine would still be going on. And in the David and Goliath struggle, David seems to at least be holding his own against the vastly superior might of the Russian army. There was a message on the wall of the Hidden Lane Tearoom. It did make us wonder what would have happened if Mad Vlad had gone for tea first.

The football World Cup is scheduled to take place in Qatar at the end of the year. Wouldn’t it be fantastic if Ukraine qualified! However, there’s a fly in the ointment … Scotland. The only thing standing between Ukraine and qualifying for the World Cup is Scotland. They have to play to decide which country goes through. Oh no, what a dilemma!

G3 8ND tel: 0141 2374391 Hidden Lane

///craft.beans.dream

Scones, Top, totallyeffinbrilliantscone

Jesmond Dene House

15th March 2022 billpaterson1@me.com 5 Comments

Forgive us if this seems to be turning into “what we did on our holidays” but it’s tricky because this actually is what we did on our holidays, albeit only a few days. In fact it wasn’t our holidays, it was more of a sconological expedition south of the border where few sconeys have gone before. By now you all know the sort of extraordinary sacrifices we make in order to keep you up to date with sconey news. This is no exception. For this post we had to stay here in Jesmond Dene House. We know, we know but we felt duty bound!

A bit of history

The house was built in the Arts and Crafts style in 1871 by Sir Andrew Noble who worked for Lord William Armstrong … the oligarchs of their time. They became fabulously wealthy through shipping and the manufacture of armaments. It was forever thus. It’s been a hotel since 2005 and has a beautiful setting on the edge of the Dene Burn. Celebrities and Royalty have been entertained here … and now us!

The Great Hall at Jesmond Dene House — When they said our table was ready we did not expect this! Not really but it is the Great Hall

Of course, we were only here for the scones! We had a notion it might be a bit more expensive than our last post from Olivers Bistro Café and we weren’t wrong. We could have sat outside in the spring sunshine but they actually seated us in a cosy little alcove beside a wonderfully warm open fire … fab! Our lovely chatty waiter was from Venice. We know everything about him: his early life; his career, his children, his failed marriage, we could go on!

Two baby two

When you order a scone you actually get two and you can pick from a variety they have on offer. We chose fruit and cheese. They came with little bowls of butter and jam as well as a pot of cream and huge linen napkins. They were wonderfully warm and were absolutely delicious. £10 for two scones and coffee but worth every penny. If ever there was a challenger to our benchmark Fonab Castle’s scone, this was it.

Rivet Catcher

We told our Venetian friend that we are going to try the Metro. He looked shocked and said in his Italian accent “No, it’s rubbish“. He went on to elaborate “I’ve been here six years and I’ve only been on it once … and that was enough!” Of course, he was comparing Newcastle to Rome, London and Paris so we weren’t unduly concerned. Undeterred we set off for a station about ten minutes walk from the hotel. An ‘ALL DAY’ ticket was £5 each. This allowed us to travel anywhere we liked, get off and on as many times as we liked and valid for the whole day. We’re loving it already!

Okay, the trains are a bit on the basic side but they rattle along and we did managed to hit 33 of the 60 stations on the system … yes we counted them! We went to the beach in Tynemouth and then, to finish off, a drink of Rivet Catcher in the Cumberland Arms.

Internal view of the Cumberland Arms, Tynemouth — Cumberland Arms in Tynemouth

Romance in not dead

Then, because Pat has always wanted to go on a cruise (not,) we went to North Shields and caught the ferry across the Tyne (the Metro ticket does that as well). Only a seven minute cruise but, in the golden evening light, it was very romantic … honest!

The Shields ferry — Spirit of the Tyne approaching North Shields with South Shields in the distance

Anyone for billiards

It was well and truly dark when we got back to Jesmond Dene House. We decided to have dinner beside another large open fire in the billiard room. No billiards but presumably there must have been at one time!

Internal view of Jesmond Dene House — Lady Muck in the billiard room

Looking at us with a fearful expression our waiter friend was keen to know if we had gone on the Metro. When we told him what we had done he was super impressed. He had never heard of anyone doing that before! All we can say is that if you want to get a quick feel for the area and the people you could do a lot worse than take a trip on the Metro.

A picture at the Cumberland Arms, Tynemouth — Interesting painting in the Cumberland Arms

Dinner was fabulous by the way … a bit pricey for our Scottish pockets but fabulous.

Hero

Our thoughts are with Marina Ovsyannikova, the lady who protested live on Russian television. From totally unknown to worldwide hero in an instant … wow! We dread to think what will happen to her now but fingers crossed she’s okay?

NE2 2EY tel: 0191 212 3000 Jesmond Dene

///mull.names.urgent

Scones, Top, topweird

Clootie McToot

7th March 2022 billpaterson1@me.com 7 Comments

Clootie McToot, in the little village of Abernethy, makes clootie dumplings and exports them all over the world. One of its dumplings has even made it to Everest basecamp. They could never be described as ‘light’ so don’t think anyone would actually want to carry one to the summit. Great sustenance though! Essentially, you can have anything you want in Clootie McTooties as long as it’s dumpling … correction, they also make scones.

Rhyming dumplings

If you are not from Scotland and are wondering what a clootie dumpling is then let us explain. Nowadays, making them is something of a lost art but Pat’s mother and my mother along with many other mothers used to make them regularly. You take the ingredients, a bit like those for Christmas cake, wrap them in a ‘cloot’ (cloth) and boil them forever. They were immortalised in this children’s poem:

Obviously, pouring a dumpling out of the spout of a kettle is impossible but that didn’t matter back in those days, we used to recite it with great joy.

Magic dumplings

Sometimes the cloot would be a pillow case because many dumplings were the size of a football and were so heavy only your mother was capable of lifting them. Dumplings also had magical properties. When children got a portion they would, after a bit of rummaging, inevitably find a coin wrapped up in grease proof paper … so exciting! For some reason, my father always got a button? A big dumpling would last our family a week … hot, cold, sliced, fried … or hot with custard, cold with custard, fried with custard. No, not that last one but you get my drift. Suffice to say that Michelle, who runs Clootie McToot, has taken it upon herself to resurrect clootie dumplings and introduce them to a brand new audience … well done her.

We were looked after by young lass, Daisy, who was forever polite and attentive. After some soup for lunch she offered us cheese scones or chocolate orange scones. You guessed it, Pat went for cheese whereas the chocolate orange just had to be done … living on the edge! When they arrived on our table the only way to describe them was “impressive”.

Finger licking

Mine had a dollop of chocolate sauce on top and Pat’s cheese scone was simply “huge”. The chef actually came out and apologised. He had left someone else in charge of portioning the scones that morning and they had ended up a bit bigger than they should have been. On the basis that they shouldn’t really be a meal in themselves we normally don’t like big scones but these were sooo good. The chocolate orange one tasted really chocolatey and orangey with a lovely texture and crunchy exterior. The chocolate splodge on top meant it all got a bit messy but absolutely ‘finger licking’ good. Pat said her scone was one of the best she had ever tasted even though she couldn’t eat it all. Topscones all round, yeah!

If ever we needed a Treaty?

A shackle in Abernethy — A shackle attached to the round tower … it actually fitted Pat’s neck

Events in Ukraine are disastrous for all concerned. Unimaginable for us quietly sitting here in Clootie McToot in a sleepy little village like Abernethy. Having said that, Abernethy was not always like this … once it was the “capital” of the kingdom of the Picts. The round tower you see in the picture, just outside Clootie McToot’s door, is only one of two in Scotland. It dates from the 11th century. The Treaty of Abernethy, signed here in 1072, between Malcolm III, King of Scotland and William the Conqueror, actually secured an uneasy peace between England and Scotland that lasted more than a week! If we could get Vladimir Putin and Volodymyr Zelenskyy to come to Abernethy maybe they would sign another treaty? Dumpling incentives could be involved?

Aqua vitae

Decorative pillar at Clootie McToot, Abernethy — decorated metal pillar

They have quite a range of dumplings for sale so we are now the proud owners of a Clootie McToot cherry, date & Lindores aqua vitae dumpling. It’s delicious! The aqua vitae comes from the local Lindores distillery which opened its modern facility in 2017 but whisky has been distilled on the site since 1494. Clootie McToot also have dumpling kits and dumpling classes. So you, dear reader, have no excuse.

PH2 9JB. tel: 01738 850795 Clootie

///aims.essential.unto

Scones, Top

Tilly Tearoom

3rd March 2022 billpaterson1@me.com 1 Comment

It’s a week since our last post at Another Tilly Tearoom and here we are now at the original Tilly Tearoom in Tillicoultry. It’s also been a week since the start of the war in Ukraine. What a week of absolute horror but it has also showcased the best and worst of humanity! It’s embarrassing that we seem to be so helpless in the face of such unprovoked Russian aggression and the UK’s mean spirited attitude to refugees is even more embarrassing. The Little Englanders seem to think that these people actually want to come here? They don’t, and the few that do will undoubtedly return to their homeland just as soon as they safely can. Poland and the rest of the EU are putting the UK to shame! But honestly, what can we expect when so many of our MPs are funded with Russian money?

Size doesn’t matter

Anyway, we also experienced the best of humanity in another area completely. Yes, in this place, Tilly Tearoom. If we had decided to do both of these tearooms we should probably have started with this one , however, given that we didn’t know that either existed you will just have to put up with them in the wrong order. This place is obviously similar to Another Tilly Tearoom but is even smaller. There’s nothing fancy, just simple food served by friendly, enthusiastic staff.

A delight

Laura was looking after us and she represented humanity at its best … young, pretty, enthusiastic and oozing kindness. I had to ask her what colour her hair was because I couldn’t quite place it. Pointing at her head, she said “my original colour, or this?” I said ‘this“, to which she replied “well, I’m actually blonde but I had too much time on my hands during Covid so this is Flamingo Pink“. Of course it was. Her eyelashes were so long, one careless flutter could have blown the froth off our coffees! She was a delight!

After some lunch she offered us a plain scone but “there’s one banoffee (banana and toffee) scone left if you would like that?” We were sharing … I wanted the banoffee but Pat wanted plain. So plain it was … it’s good to know your place! It came with generous portions of jam and cream. Once again Pat had the top half and I had the bottom. It was lovely and we didn’t hesitate to award a topscone. In 2019, the Tilly Tearoom won an award as the Most Welcoming Café of the Year and we can easily understand why. When we were leaving we told Laura that the scone was the best we had had since we were at Another Tilly tearoom. She promptly asked “which was best?“, oh gosh, talk about being put on the spot?

Daring do

External view of Tilly Tearoom, Tillicoultry — Tilly tearoom with the Ochil hills in the distance

Every time I’m in Tillycoultry I think back to the the Great Tin Tray Championships of 1967. A small group of us climbed the grassy slopes of the Ochil hills that provide a backdrop to the town. We were all carrying tin beer trays. Mine was a black and gold Guinness tray, built for speed. The idea was to see who would be fastest to the bottom while sitting on the tray. Suffice to say that this side of the Ochil hills is entirely friction free. We were back at the bottom in seconds having experienced a completely uncontrolled hair raising ride. No idea who won but we all survived. Those were the days!

Make tae not war sign at Tilly Tearoom, Tillicoultry — This sign in the Tilly Tearoom makes perfect sense

The pictures of Mad Vlad sitting at one end of a table with his generals sitting about half a mile away at the the other end, speaks volumes. He is unhinged to put it politely. But, with a fair wind, this should be the end for Putin!

It’s easy to feel pessimistic with everything going on in Ukraine so it seems slightly absurd to be talking about scones in such circumstances. However, as long as we have people like Volodymyr Zelenskyy and she of the Flamingo Pink hair in Tilly tearoom, there’s hope.

FK13 6DP tel: 01259 752642. Tilly Tearoom

///weary.evidently.cocoons

ps: as we were leaving a small boy was tucking into the one and only banoffee scone. Annoyingly, he looked as if he was really enjoying it!

Scones, Top

Another Tilly Tearoom

24th February 2022 billpaterson1@me.com 5 Comments

When the owners of the Tilly Tearoom in Tillicoultry decided to expand they bought this place in Dunblane near Stirling. When it came to a name, however, they were stumped. They thought and they thought and they thought … and then it came to them …. Another Tilly Tearoom, brilliant!

Gingham and teapots

It’s a very homely kind of place. A sort of jumble of tiny rooms each with two or three tables. Between each room there’s a short flight of steps so the staff have to be pretty fit to work here. The lady looking after us was super good and managed to engage everyone in friendly conversation with whizzing around the place. She soon had us sorted out with a couple of toasted sandwiches for lunch and a scone to share afterwards. She told us that there was only one fruit scone left but she would put it to one side for us … what service! The gingham table clothes the vast teapot collection and the mismatched chinaware give Another Tilly Tearoom a pleasant cottagy feel. We were sitting right next to a big roaring fire that would have had us roasted to death if it hadn’t just been a painting.

Lunch was excellent and when our scone arrived it came with generous pots of jam and cream. As always Pat took the top half and, very quickly, I could tell by the mmming that we might be heading for a topscone. It was quite big so we were very glad that we were sharing but overall it was delicious. On a really horrible wet day Another Tilly Tearoom succeeded in lifting our spirits with this topscone. Now we need to try the other Tilly Tearoom.

Vlad the invader

Today is a momentous day for all the wrong reasons. Russia has invaded Ukraine, or be more precise, Vladimir Putin has invaded Ukraine. We are pretty sure that ordinary Russians have got better things to worry about than Ukraine. All the frantic diplomacy over the past few weeks seems to have come to zilch. Even Boris’s efforts came to nought. To cap it all, now Trump has come out on Vlad’s side and when you hear Putin speak you can almost hear Trump saying exactly the same words. Imagine what the US reaction would have been with Trump still in power. We live in a crazy world!

In the UK, it’s odd that the Conservative party, the upholder of freedom for all, should be funded by a communist regime like Vlad the Invader’s Russia. Hath they no scruples? That was rhetorical! We ‘re sure that much more would be made of political funding if it wasn’t for the Labour Party being in debt to China. You really couldn’t make it up!

After thirty years of independence and prosperity we feel heart sorry for all those Ukranians who now feel they have to flee their homes. Given those in charge, goodness knows what will happen now. On the railings of St Blane’s church, right next door to Another Tilly Tearoom we came across this message. Hasn’t worked in any of the world’s other conflict zones but faced with a Putin/Trump combo it might be all that’s left!

FK15 0ER tel: 01786 823968 Another Tilly FB

///growth.alienated.odds

Waterloo and all that

Questions

Honesty

No mean feat!

Borrowers

27?

Rwanda and Eurovision

It started with a post

Eating rotten things

Barefoot

Deluded as Trump

Colin for PM

A Highland Playground

Friendly service

Peachy

A different life

Indoor beaches

Local produce

Exciting

Double awards

A bit of history

Two baby two

Rivet Catcher

Romance in not dead

Anyone for billiards

Hero

Rhyming dumplings

Magic dumplings

Finger licking

If ever we needed a Treaty?

Aqua vitae

Size doesn’t matter

A delight

Daring do

Gingham and teapots

Vlad the invader

by Bill and Pat Paterson and is about finding good scones throughout the world, with a little bit of politics