Tag Archives: Israel

Scones, Top

Humbie Hub

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Logo of the Humbie HubJust in case readers are beginning to get the wrong idea and assume that we just hang out in places like the Fife Arms, let us banish that thought. Nothing could be further from the truth. This post comes from somewhere that is no less enjoyable but from the opposite end of the spectrum. The Humbie Hub is a small, humble even, village Post Office/Cafe/Shop just south of Edinburgh … but how did we hear about it? Well, somebody told somebody who told somebody else who told our Trossachs correspondents who told us. The scone network of spies and informers spreads ever deeper.

Got to let mum know

A small hamlet like Humbie is no stranger to momentous events. Communication is an odd beast these days. Everybody (especially Alexa) seems to know everything and nothing, all at the same time. Obviously the name Humbie Hub infers that it is at the centre of things … and it very much is! This was particularly true, however,  in 1953 when it was known as the Telegraph & Telephone Call Office. Suffice to say that the good folks of Humbie knew that Mount Everest had been conquered long before the rest of the world. The leader of the Everest expedition, John Hunt, sent a telegram to his mum who was living in Humbie at the time. The news wasn’t released to the rest of the world until the following month on the day of Queen Elizabeth’s coronation.

Joyous
View of Whitburgh House and dovecot
Whitburgh House and Dovecote where dad worked as a forester

By that time, of course, the village was well used to momentous events. A few years previously I had been born there!

Whitburgh cottage over the years
Whitburgh cottages in 1948,, 2012 and the present day

That glorious event was celebrated with much pageantry and joyous celebrations in the street(s) of Humbie … I’m pretty sure there’s more than one street. At least that’s how I imagine it.

External view of Whitburgh cottage
It’s just missing a blue plaque

I left when I was two months old and headed north to the Highlands. I always used to say that although I had been born in Humbie, I’d never been there. Obviously a false statement. Incredibly, sixty four years were to elapse before I darkened Humbie’s doorstep again. The news from our Trossachs correspondents about the advent of the Humbie Hub was all the excuse we needed for another visit.Internal view of the Humbie Hub

Thoughtful

There were lots of people sitting outside in the spring sunshine and as soon as you enter the Humbie Hub you just sense that it’s a happy place. As well as the Post Office you can buy almost anything imaginable in the shop. There’s a therapy room, a studio and rooms to let … they don’t miss a trick. A scone at the Humbie Hub

We ordered a ham and mustard toastie and a fruit scone … both to share. Thoughtfully, they halved the toastie and served it on separate plates along with some salad. Likewise the scone came with a second plate complete with jam and butter. That’s never happened to us anywhere else. Great service from people who, although busy, were cheerful and still took the time to chat. The very delicious scone had been baked by the lovely smiling Jenny. It’s a slight departure from custom but we decided to overlook the lack of cream and award a topscone … great place.

Toilets

Toilet twinning posterIt was intriguing to find that Humbie Hub toilet was twinned with another not quite so plush one in Malawi thanks to the local Primary school. We knew that Scotland had a long standing friendship with Malawi through the Scotland-Malawi Partnership  by hadn’t realised it extended to toilets.  It’s shocking to think, with the £trillions being thrown at wars all over the place, that kiddiwinks are still dying of diarrhoea through lack of basic sanitation.

Me with the panther at Whitburgh cottage
Next the the cottage where I was born there’s a panther made of pennies …. we don’t understand either!

And another mystery,  Now that Iran has launched an overnight attack on Israel, Western governments seem to be urging retaliation. Both Israel and Iran worship the same God, why don’t they ask Him what He would do? Whatever happened to “turn the other cheek?”

EH36 5PJ       tel: 01875 833 262         Humbie Hub

///anyway.shocking.fuses

ps: one of the Trossachs correspondent’s informants for this post was teacher, operatic soprano and artist Margot Archibald. 

Watercolour by Margot Archibald
“Adagio” by Margot Archibald

On the 23rd of this month she will be holding an exhibition of her atmospheric works at the Humbie Hub. All proceeds  go to MacMillan Cancer and victims of the Holocaust. Pat and I don’t know Margot but very much hope she sells the lot … good luck!

Ordinary, Scones, self-service

Braco Coffee

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Braco Coffee is in the pretty little of village of Braco (pronounced break-o) population about 500. You would be forgiven for thinking that nothing much has ever happened here but you would be wrong.

On the outskirts of the village lies Fort Ardoch, a long abandoned Roman fortification. There’s only grass covered mounds these days to denote where the walls once were. Diagram of Roman helmetOnce while walking by the river we could hear distant commands “sinister dexter, sinister dexter.” Eventually it got much louder and a platoon of marching Roman Legionnaires appeared. They were in full costume and carrying spears with a commanding officer at the front giving them their marching orders. We spoke to them and apparently this is what some men do instead of going to football on a Saturday afternoon. They just march around for a bit, then go home again. We don’t understand either but they seemed very happy.

Damned cows!

But never mind the Romans, more importantly, my mum lodged here during WWII when she worked in forestry. 

My mum lodged in one of these houses with a lovely lady called Jessie Allan

My dad was in forestry as well and Braco is where they did all their courting.  Apparently on one of their dates my dad left his BSA motorbike in a field. When they returned (from wherever they had been 🥴) the straw stuffed saddle of the bike had been eaten by a cow.  We tell you this to illustrate the fact that without this wee village this blog might never have materialised. Unthinkable, we know. Logo of Braco Coffee

Somewhere as salubrious as Braco Coffee wouldn’t have been available to dad back then hence mum’s invite to a field. Even if it had been, words like “cuppocinno”, “americano” or “flat white” would have been absolutely meaningless to them. We pass through Braco quite often and have had this place in our sights for a while. The clincher came when the Laird reported the cakes as excellent though he wasn’t sure about the scones. Obviously we had to check!Internal view of Braco Coffee

There was a steady stream of people coming and going  so we had to wait a wee while to place our order at the counter. A scone atBraco CoffeeNormally these cafes are staffed by young girls but here it seemed to be all young lads. Anyway, it didn’t take them long to have us sorted with our coffees and a fruit scone. There wasn’t any cream and the butter and jam was all prepacked but the scone itself was really good. We thoroughly enjoyed it. Not quite topscone but close.

Memories

Afterwards I took Pat a couple of hundred yards along the road to the Pack Horse Bridge. It’s tucked away behind the more modern road bridge over the river Knaik. Pat was surprised and swore she had never seen it before and wasn’t even aware that it existed.It was built around 1650 and must have been the main crossing point for the river for many years. It’s only about four feet wide with very low stone parapets so it must have been interesting taking horses over it.

The Pack Horse Bridge in Braco
Built around 1650 as Ardoch bridge but now known as the Pack Horse Bridge

When we got home I looked up my photo library because I was sure that I had photographed it in the past. Sure enough I had a picture from 2006 … with Pat and the rest of our family standing on it. Such is our memories these days!

Pack Horse Bridge at Braco
Before Health & Safety … now you are not allowed to walk over it
Travelling

As if that wasn’t enough Braco based anecdotes, here is one last one … promise. Given the problems in Gaza and Israel’s genocidal tendencies it made me think of a conversation about Braco when I was a mere sapling. My brother and I were working for my dad during school holidays when one of the elderly estate workers joined us while we were eating our packed lunches. He told us, when he was our age he was an estate worker in Braco with a 7am start to his working day. At that time he lived six miles away in the village of Muthill. When we asked him how he got to and from his work he said in his broad Scottish accent “oh aye, I just travelled“. Puzzled we asked if he maybe cycled or got a bus. “No” he insisted “I travelled“.

Misunderstanding

After some more probing it eventually dawned on us that by “travelled” he meant he walked. He walked six miles to his work in the morning and six miles back again at night. We hadn’t thought of that! The only reason I’m telling you this is that it was the first time I became aware of the vagaries of language. There we were, all speaking the same language but totally misunderstanding each other.

It’s why I’ve always been amazed by the EU, a union designed to stop wars but consisting of countries speaking twenty four different languages. Prior to the EU these countries used to fight like ferrets in a sack so the room for misunderstanding was immense. And yet it has been phenomenally successful at what it was designed to do. Maybe they should make Israel a member … after all it’s in Eurovision but we’d far rather they find some other solution.

FK15 9PX         tel: 01786 880 333          Braco Coffee

///magnets.poetry.showering

Scones

Dnisi

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We’re in Kirkintilloch today to see one of Pat’s aunties. She’s in her nineties and of the nine aunts and uncles on her mum’s side this aunt is the last man standing. However, we haven’t seen her since she went into a care home and we had been warned that she probably wouldn’t know who we were. Consequently we were approaching with a degree of dread, it could be a very short visit. Unfortunately we arrived just as the home was sitting down to lunch so they asked us to come back in an hour. Hence we find ourselves here in Dnisi killing time.Sign at Dnisi, Kirkintilloch

In spite of Pat having had several relatives in the Kirkie (as it’s known locally) this is the first time we have ventured downtown. Parking’s a nightmare! Dnisi is part of a chain which sports seven outlets across Scotland. It originated here in Kirkintilloch in 2004. Their unique selling point is “roasted in-store coffee”. Having invested in small coffee roasting machines, they actually roast their coffee on site in each venue. You can also buy the D’nisi blend to take away. On a large hessian sign pinned to the wall they also proclaim to have award winning handbaked scones . All very promising!Variety of scones at Dnisi, Kirkintilloch

Overindulging

We decided to share a toasted cheese andwich and a fruit scone along with some of their special coffee. Imagine our surprise when the huge toasted sandwiched arrived on two plates with half the sandwich on each accompanied with a salad and french fries. A scone at Dnisi, KirkintillochEach plate was lunch on its own! We had just wanted a snack but it was all so delicious that it disappeared quite quickly.  Then the scone! It was huge as well! Unfortunately, it too was delicious with a lovely crunchy exterior so it went the same way as the sandwich.  

Together with the friendly service it might well have been a topscone had it not been quite so big and the jam and cream hadn’t been prepackaged. They are trying very hard in Dnisi, however, we would thoroughly recommend it. By the way, the coffee was good as well, Not as good as our favourite Cat’s Pyjamas, but good.Internal view of Dnisi, Kirkintilloch

It was time to return to the nursing home so we waddled out past the grey granite drinking fountain which you can see in the title picture. At the top there is the motto of Kirkintilloch which says ‘Ca’canny but ca’awa‘. It’s in Scots but an English translation might be ‘Carry on carefully, but keep carrying on’.  We might adopt that as our own motto!

Back at the nursing home, we needn’t have worried. Pat’s aunt knew us straight away. She was absolutely delighted to see us and insisted on introducing us to all her friends. It was a joyful visit!

Time?

No joy, however, elsewhere. The war in Gaza makes us feel positively sick. sign at Dnisi, KirkintillochThe situation is absolutely desperate. When we think about the causes, however, one thing seems to stand out … God! It may not be PC these days to think of Him as a Him but for the purposes of this blog He’s a bloke. The puzzling thing is that He is on both sides. Apparently about 2000 years ago He told the Jews that the land of Israel was theirs. A bit unGodlike to show favouritism but let’s accept that He did.

That would be fine it wasn’t for Him also promising the same land to the Palestinians who had been living there for thousands of years before. Isn’t it a crying shame that they didn’t have iPhones back then to record all these conversations with God! The Holy Land has always been a mess but there were people happily living there when it was just Land. God is always blessing America and that in itself should demonstrate what a deeply flawed individual He is! And three or four thousand years is but a blink of an eye in terms of time so perhaps it might help if both sides just left God out of it … He’s not helping! 

Luckily we still have joyful old aunties and places like Dnisi to see us through!

G66 1JD        tel: 0141 578 0135           Dnisi

///signed.mammals.spun

Scones, Top

Darnley Coffee House

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Today we are in Darnley Coffee House. Built in the 16th century it’s had a long and chequered history. At one time it served as a rather famous brothel and now it’s said to be troubled by poltergeists … you know, things that go bump in the night!  Apparently, however, it takes its name from Lord Darnley whose home it used to be. He was Mary Queen of Scots second of three husbands. Of little import, you might think, when scones are in question! However, a brief bullet-point history may help readers understand the sort of dramas this place (and its scones) may have witnessed back then!
 
  • Mary became Queen of Scotland when she was six days old. She was crowned and spent the first four years of her life just a few hundred yards away from Darnleys Coffee House in Stirling Castle.
  • In 1558, aged 15, she married the 14 year old Dauphin  Francis of France and became Queen of France as well as Scotland when his dad died a year later.  She was sixteen.
  • King Francis died when she was eighteen whereupon she was sent back to Scotland (no offspring had transpired so no longer required)
  • Four years after returning to Scotland she fell head over heels in love with her half cousin, Lord Darnley (in whose house we are currently eating scones – albeit the stables of the house)
  • Darnley turned out (like a lot of Lords to this very day) to be a bit of a waste of space so Mary ended up  pretty much disregarding  him.
That old chestnut – jealousy!
  • Darnley became jealous of Mary’s Italian private secretary David Rizzio. Darnley thought, wrongly, that Rizzio  may have been responsible for his wife being pregnant.
  • Darnley, aided and abetted by Lord Bothwell stabbed Rizzio fifty six times in the Queen’s bedchamber in Holyrood Palace. The blood stains are still there!  Then, for good measure, they kicked him down the stairs … Rizzio was dead!
  • Later, Darnley was living at Kirk o’ Field in Edinburgh when it was blown up. He was found dead in the garden. The body, however, was unharmed … he had been suffocated!
  • In 1567 Mary visited her and Darnley’s son James, in Stirling Castle (he was only ten months old). Mary never saw her son again.
  • Mary was forced to abdicate and her son became King of Scotland and England when he was thirteen months old (can it get any weirder?)
  • Yes, Lord Bothwell, surprise, surprise, turned out to be another waste of space. He abducted and raped Mary in Dunbar Castle. After being divorced for a full twelve days Bothwell forced Mary to marry him in 1567. You’d never guess that he had an ulterior motive! She later miscarried twins while imprisoned in a castle on a tiny island in the middle of Loch Leven.
  • A year later she escaped and raised an army to fight the Battle of Langside.
  • Ten years later Lord Bothwell, imprisoned in a Danish castle, died having gone completely insane.
  • Because Mary was Catholic and had a legitimate claim to the English throne she spent 19 years imprisoned in various castles in both Scotland and England.
  • In 1587 at Fotheringhay Castle, Mary, aged 44, had her head chopped by her cousin Elizabeth I (not actually by Elizabeth – she got someone to do it for her)
Learning outcomes

Readers who have persevered so far will, if nothing else, have learned two things 1. Lords are generally a waste of space 2. Castles are useful for all sorts of things.  Nothing about scones though … unless, of course, you continue reading!

old illustration of Stirling at Darnley Coffee House
Picture in Darleysb of the street outside. Lord Darley may even be it?
Alluring
Earlier in the day we had been to see an old black and white movie “The Edge of the World” supposedly set on remote St Kilda.  In 1937 they couldn’t get permission to film on St Kilda so resorted to producing the film on the equally remote island of Foula in the Shetlands. For me, St Kilda is unique in that it seems to become even more alluring after you have visited. Nowhere else has had that same affect.  Anyway, the movie was highly unrealistic but remarkable in that they got the technology of the age to work at all in such a remote place.
 
Wee stills
After that we visited Stirling Distillery. The still at Stirling DistilleryI was puzzled how such a small distillery was able to produce any whisky at all. Turns out they can only do very small batches. Their first produce won’t be ready until 2027. And there won’t be much of it even then … probably about 300 bottles. When we saw the stiil it all started to make sense ,… it’s tiny! Let’s hope they can make it commercially viable. Meantime, gin sales willl have to keep the whole thing going. We bought a bottle of their nettle gin then we headed a little way down the street to Darnleys Coffee House.
 
Internal view of Darnley Coffee HouseThe first thing you notice is the barrel vaulted ceilings. They don’t do them like that any more. Like the distillery, it’s small and easily managed by just two or three very friendly staff who seem to take a real pride in what they do. Internal view of Darnley Coffee House
Having had quite a busy day of watching movies and visiting distilleries we felt in need of sustenance. Lunch was plentiful and absolutely delicious! The question was, could we manage a scone as well? 
Cream tea
Well, you know the answer to that. Cream tea at Darnley Coffee HouseThey offered a cream tea which came with  two scones … one each. They were a bit bigger than expected so, at first, we thought we had been a tad ambitious. No worries, they were nicely presented, warm and just as delicious as our lunch had been.  In no time they were nowhere to be seen! We dithered a little over a topscone award but eventually  decided that they just made it. Well done Darnley Coffee House, 
 
Internal view of Darnley Coffee House
Hostages?
There’s a tiny flicker of humanity appearing in the Israel/Gaza war. A brief ceasefire has been agreed, conditional on the release of Israeli hostages held in Gaza. Israel calls its Palestinian hostages ‘prisoners’ and has published the names  of 300 potential releases. Only half that number will actually be released … how thoughtless and cruel is that?
Dead right or right dead?
Isn’t it odd that every war is fought between people who honestly believe they are ‘right’. Or, at least we’re not aware of any war being fought with one side believing they’re wrong. God is always on both sides! War doesn’t make any sense unless both sides are ‘right’ … but then that doesn’t make sense either?  And they never end with one side being proved wrong … just dead! On that basis Israel will win this war, not because they are ‘right’ but just because the Palestinians are dead … what a fab solution!  You would have thought, with 80 million deaths in WWII, us homo sapiens would have learned something?
 
Okay, that’s it, Pat and I need to get on with our cosy little lives!
 

FK8 1BS           tel: 01786 474468          Darnley Coffee FB

///press.rewarding.indoor

Ordinary, Scones, self-service

Spean Bridge Mill

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Getting to Spean Bridge Mill wasn’t by way of our intended route. Our mood on finally leaving Kinloch Lodge matched the weather … it was raining! We wanted to take the ferry from Armadale to Mallaig  on the mainland so that we had a different route going home.  Unable to book on line, however, we decided to just turn up. The ferries are big boats after all and during the winter months they would be quiet. Wrong! CalMac, the ferry operator, had not only reduced the number of crossings from nine to two per day, they have also reduced the size of the boat. It could only take ten cars and guess what, we were … car eleven! The ferryman said “you couldn’t book because it was full” We said “but it doesn’t say that on the booking site?” He said “I know, it’s not fair“… argh!

Skye Bridge
the bridge from Skye to Kyle of Lochalsh on the mainland
Retracing

We had no choice but go back the way we had come and use the Skye Bridge, Now our return route was to be the same as that taken on our way to Skye several days ago. Thankfully, this time, there was no snow on the high ground as we approached Cluanie, We stopped briefly at the Commando Memorial just before  reaching the village of Spean Bridge. The Memorial looks out over the hills of Ben Nevis though today they were all shrouded in mist.

The Commando Monument at Spear Bridge
Pat and the Commando Memorial

On the 11th of this month we had Armistice Day. Wouldn’t it be good if this day was used to display the true horrors of war and the abject stupidity of it all? That might be more productive than one that honours it and sanitises it with poppies. These commandos were paid a pittance to go out and kill and be killed. Most veterans say wars are nothing but a complete waste. The way we honour war makes it much easier for politicians to ease their consciences and start meddling in other people’s affairs. Perhaps with wars being a veritable gold mine for some people it might be an idea to forbid all MPs from holding any kind of interest in arms companies.  Or … world leaders should be compelled to recite the words of “Where is the Love” by the Black Eyed Peas. Just a thought! 

Panto season

At least Armistice Day finally gave Rishi Sunak the backbone to, at long last, get rid of Home Secretary, Suella Braverman.  Her rabble rousing statements labelling Palestinian protests as ‘hate marches’ didn’t really leave him much option. They were attended peacefully by over 300,000 people with most of the trouble caused by thugs from the Islamophobic, English Defence League.

The return of Dave

In his reshuffle, Rishi has brought back former Prime Minister, David Cameron as Foreign Secretary. Since he’s not even an MP, Rishi could only do this because yesterday at breakfast time, the King made Cameron a Lord. That means he can only sit in the completely unaccountable House of Lords. And here’s us thinking that the pantomime season hadn’t started yet!

Cameron was PM when we started this blog eight years ago and there’s been an unbelievable five PMs since then. With Ukraine and Israel, Cameron has undoubtedly got his work cut out so we can only wish him luck. It’s ironic that Israel seems hell-bent on casting itself as the worst abuser of human rights and breaker of international laws since the Nazis. America’s unswerving support for Israel could make you suspect that it will become the 51st state. Could it be that they just see themselves as fellow colonisers? The war is thinly disguised as a war against Hamas but what is Hamas? Nowhere in the media have we seen any attempt to explain why Hamas even exists. Another mystery!Internal view of Spean Bridge Mill

Self service

Anyway, enough ranting, what about the scones or is that going to be another rant? Spean Bridge Mill is only a couple of miles from the Commando Memorial. It is a woollen mill quite obviously set up to cater for busloads of tourists … gift shop, whisky shop etc.  At this time of year it’s quiet. In the cafe, almost the first thing we came to on the self-service counter was the scones … preloaded!. Goodness, they were impressive! So impressive we decided to give them a try. It wasn’t until we reached the cash desk we realised they had some normal scones as well. By that time it was too much hassle to go back and start again.Scone at Spean Bridge Mill

To make matters worse they had put the jam on top of the cream! And here we are thinking Cameron had problems! And to make matters even WORSER, they were quite good. Mamma mia!  You had to eat them with a fork and knife and spoon but they tasted good and were a nice consistency. They reminded us of Kiki McColl’s scones at Liosbeag Café on the Isle of Lismore eight years ago. Obviously Spean Bridge Mill wasn’t a topscone but definitely an experience.

After that we were homeward bound again after a memorable few days away. Although we covered a fair bit of Skye there was lots we didn’t get to. We need to go back … and the sooner the better!

PH34 4EP         tel: 01397 712260          Speak Bridge Mill FB

///nickname.splint.triathlon

ps: Suella has just published a three page letter announcing that her former boss, Rishi Sunak, is a complete waste of oxygen. He’s behind you Suella … oh no he isn’t, oh yes he is!

Scones, Top

Balbirnie House revisited

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We last visited Balbirnie House back in January when Rishi Sunak was visiting Scotland as Prime Minister for the first time. He was to be Nicola Sturgeon’s fifth Prime Minister, such was the turnover in Tory PM’s. Now she has gone as well but having just passed her driving test at the ripe old age of 53 she seems to be thoroughly enjoying having time to herself again. With an upcoming election Rishi might soon be able to do the same.

He keeps telling us that Britain is leading the world in just about everything. Problem is that, according to a recent report, we are also leading in terms of destitution with  3.8 million people now defined in that way. “Destitution” differs from “poverty” in that it means that people suffering from destitution can no longer afford the basics required to live. Of the 3.8 million, 1 million are children. Normally, destitution results in homelessness.  With most of the government consisting of multi-millionaires they won’t have the slightest notion about destitution so they’ll probably just ignore it and hope it goes away.Logo of Balbirnie House

We offer this bleak assessment of the state of the UK as a backdrop to us wittering on about the joys of lemon curd combined with lemon flavoured scones in a large luxurious country house. We know!

Internal view of Balbirnie HouseYou might wonder why we are back here so soon, after all it’s only been a matter of months. It’s only a short drive from home but the main reason, of course, is that we enjoyed our previous visit and wanted to do again – simple! Perhaps it has something to do with the fact that they give you a cream tea when you arrive.

Locked in?

Balbirnie was built in 1815. With beautiful grounds, a golf course and 31 bedrooms, all with beds the size of Texas, it’s particularly popular for weddings. It even has its own “padlock fence” where couples can return and attach their own padlock. A bit weird but we think we understand?

Padlock fence at Balbirnie House
If you are all loved up you might use this, obviously Cameron and Catriona were!

External view of Balbirnie House

Scones at Balbirnie HouseLemons were also grown in orangeries and when our scones arrived they turned out to be lemon scones accompanied with lemon curd and clotted cream. A heady combination which we had never tried before.  Pat wasn’t too sure so they supplied her with a little dish of raspberry jam as an alternative. We seldom if ever attach the word ‘tangy’ to a scone tasting but these were delicious and ‘tangy’. There’s a first … and an easy topscone.
 
External view of Balbirnie House
Senseless
As if the world doesn’t have enough senseless killing at the moment, there’s been yet another shooting in the US. This one was in Lewiston, Maine with at least eighteen people dead so far. The 565th mass shooting in the US this year. Republicans will doubtless trot out that tired and tattered line “guns don’t kill – people do”.  Except, of course, people do find it much much more difficult to kill without guns! C’mon Republicans you can do better than this?
 

KY7 6NE        tel: 01592 610066         Balbirnie House Hotel

///freshest.seats.period

Ordinary, Scones

The Aurrie

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Storm Babet has abated leaving much devastation in its wake. We have come through unscathed and are out and about again. Having said that we got here to the Aurrie in a very round about way. Here’s how!

Miracles do happen

You all know by now that when the days start getting shorter we sometimes go to the cinema after breakfast. Today we had to drop our car off for repair, so the garage  drove us to the Hippodrome, Scotland’s oldest cinema, to watch The Miracle Club.  Set initially in Ireland it’s a heartwarming story about the women of Ballygar going to Lourdes in search of miracle cures. A tad predictable but suffice to say that they find Lourdes a bit of a con. Unsurprisingly no miracles of the God given kind but some minor ones of the human variety. It’s a good watch.

You get a cup of tea and a biscuit at the Hippodrome. It’s called a “cuppa screening”. All too much for a lady seated behind us who snored loudly for a considerable part of the film. Thankfully more a comment on her state of exhaustion rather than the quality of the film. There were a few giggles but no-one woke her. It’s all part of going to the cinema with a load of other retired folk. The garage collected us again and with our car restored and it being a nice day we set off into Fife.A sign at the Aurrie

Eventually we ended up in Lower Largo. it’s a pretty little fishing village where Pat used to go on holiday as a teenager.  She would come with her best friend by bus and, at the time, although just about fifty miles, it seemed like the other side of the world from Glasgow. That was a fair while ago so she didn’t see much that seemed familiar today.  However, what you do notice driving down to the beach is a number of strange sculptures and elaborately carved gates. They’re by local artist Alan Faulds who carves them from solid Scottish oak and decorates them with up to twenty coats of paint and varnish. Presumably to protect them from the salty air.

A couple of gates close to  the Aurrie
Service over and above

The Aurrie is housed in what used to be a Baptist church down near the beach. These days it’s a café come gallery and event centre for the local community.  It even serves as the cinema. A sign at the AurrieThere seemed to be very few customers when we arrived but it was quite busy.  Lots of people hanging a new exhibition and setting out craft stalls. It had a great community feel to it, summed up nicely by one of the counter staff. She was sitting at a table with a baby sound asleep on her chest. At least it wasn’t snoring! The baby wasn’t hers, she was just looking after it for one of the women mounting the exhibition. Now that’s service!Internal view of the Aurrie in Lower Largo

Apparently, the Aurrie gets its name from an old Scots word for “area”. It’s applied to the slipway road leading down to the beach.  The locals say that there are as many ways to spell it as there are grains of sand on the beach. We counted the grains and can confidently report that that is a slight exaggeration.Internal view of the Aurrie in Lower Largo

Plain as well as spiced apple scones were on offer. It had to be spiced apple! As we sat there with our scone watching everything going on (always interesting watching people deliberating how to hang pictures) we completely forgot to take a photograph of our little spiced apple wonder. Apologies! Suffice to say that it wasn’t topscone material but still very enjoyable. Logo of the Aurrie cafeNo lessons learned

Having watched The Miracle Club and witnessed community spirit thriving in Lower Largo the total disaster happening in Israel and Gaza seems all the more confusing and sad.

K6 in Lower Largo
Another Alan Faulds piece on top of a K6 telephone box outside the Aurrie

What is noticeable, however, is the one-sided nature of the media coverage. With world leaders lining up, one after the other, in support of Israel it seems as if there is only one side to the story. The whole thing has been sparked by an atrocity launched on a music festival in Israel from Gaza. No-one seems to be asking why they would even think of doing that. As with most of the world’s trouble spots the origins lie with Britain. Past masters at creating countries based on religion. After partitioning Ireland on religious grounds in 1921 you might think that they would have learned from that experience before doing it again in India in 1946 and Palestine 1948? Apparently not!

KY8 6BT                                                  The Aurrie

///pounding.tummy.proved

island, Scones, Top

Robertson’s Coffeehoose 2

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This visit to Robertson’s Coffeehoose 2 was in the winter of 2017. Perhaps we should have known better than visit Orkney at that time of year but, by the end, although completely cobweb free, we were feeling wonderful and exhilarated by the whole experience.  

Importanter

First, though the “Black Lives Matter’ controversy brought about by George Floyd’s death has taken an unexpected turn. After events in Bristol it has now expanded into a debate over statues. Goodness knows we have enough inappropriate statues in Scotland to fill Bristol harbour but that is probably a debate best left until Scotland has garnered enough self-respect to determine for itself, who, if anybody, it wants to celebrate in this way. When someone said that “education was important but beer was importanter” it made us think that none of us is perfect (okay, sconeys are perfecter than most) but perhaps statues of people of any kind are simply not appropriate any more.  Anyway, let’s go to wild and windy Orkney.

As we headed out from the shelter of Gills Bay near John O’ Groats on the Pentalina ferry we could think of no better description of what lay ahead than that of Neil Gunn. “Beyond the mainland the blue of the sea was more intense than the blue of the sky, and the Islands of The Orcades lay at anchor like fabled ships: long shapes, with clean prows to the west, with sheer sides, not riding the sea but crouching to it with that odd menace which, like tenderness, is for ever at the heart of strength”. Gunn also says that “all adventuring races have been drawn to these islands”.

After the Romans and Vikings, now it was to be the turn of sconologists! In the name of ornithology (Pat has started a new list) and sconology, we were enduring the remains of Hurricane Maria. Boy, it was windy. So it was that, somewhat relieved, we sailed into St Margaret’s Hope on South Ronaldsay.

The Hope

And our first ever encounter with an Orkney scone at Robertson’s Coffeehoose. Just the spelling announced that we were somewhere a little bit different. Interior view of Robertson's Coffeehoose, St Margaret's Hope, OrkneyThe interior reminded us of Ireland.  When we lived there you would go into a grocery store and find a few beer pumps gracing the end of the counter. It was the same here. Turns out that it used to be the general store but has recently been converted into a café/bar. It now plays a significant role in the local nightlife. We were served by a young girl who not only made us feel very welcome but also regaled us with stories of the history of Robertson’s. She also told us about The Hope, as the town is known locally.

Hard to stand up weather

The town may have got its name from Margaret, Maid of Norway and uncrowned Queen of Scotland, who died here from the effects of seasickness in 1290. She was on her way to her coronation. Luckily, we had no ill effects on the crossing but we deeply sympathise. A scone at Robertson's Coffeehoose, St Margaret's Hope, OrkneyIt may have been the warmth of the greetings or maybe it was to do with the ‘hard to stand up in’ weather outside, but our scones were particularly welcome and tasted delicious. They were warm and served with butter and a generous pot of jam. No cream but hey, we were out of the storm so who cares? All things considered we thought that this scone just slipped into the topscone category. Well done Robertson’s.

Two equal countries

After the Maid of Norway’s demise, the disputed succession sparked the Wars of Scottish Independence. When we read of the extraordinary goings-on in Catalonia, you realise that it should be so much easier for Scotland to become a self-respecting independent country. After all, that is what most people under sixty want. As stated in the Treaty of Union, the UK is a union between two equal countries, Scotland and England. Scotland is already a country in its own right.  In 1707, when the Speaker of the House of Commons said: “we have won Scotland … and we will bind her fast“. He wasn’t joking. The democratic deficit, designed to subjugate Scotland, has worked well in ensuring just that. Of course, in Catalonia, there’s also a lot of unionist sentiment. However, we can’t help feeling that, like Scotland, the problem will not be resolved with anything less than independence.

Dead eagles

A K6 from the Saracen Foundry on South RonaldsayIn our previous post from Hotel Montefiore in Israel we reported on a K6 made in the Saracen Foundry. Lo and behold, on our way to the Tomb of the Eagles at the southernmost tip of South Ronaldsay what should we come across but another. This one was being used as an exchange library for books, CDs and DVDs.

Be warned, we are on Orkney for a few days so there may be more Orcadian scones to follow. By the way, the Tomb of the Eagles was closed so not even a dead eagle for Pat’s list!

KW17 2SR      tel: 01856 831 889        Robertson’s Coffeehoose FB

You know how they say that “necessity is the mother of invention”. Well, our son has proved the truth of that statement. In the current pandemic, he is not only having to isolate but shield as well. This means that his five-year-old daughter has been unable to give her granny a hug for several months now. So, for granny’s recent birthday he made COVID hugging arms. Happy granny!

COVID-19 granny hugging arms
COVID Granny hugging arms in action

Following on from our last post on the Royal Garden Party, Pat has baked some scones to the Royal recipe. She didn’t have any buttermilk so used cream instead. They were absolutely delicious. We sat in the garden and shared them with a neighbour accompanied by lots of homemade gooseberry jelly and cream. This is how to deal with coronavirus! Clever granny!Scones made to the Royal Garden Party recipe

Scones, Top

The American Colony Hotel

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Well, here we are at the American Colony Hotel in Jerusalem. Not us obviously but our ever-diligent Middle East correspondent who sent a very comprehensive communiqué on his recent encounter with a scone. As he says the hotel lies “just a scone’s throw” from the Green Line. That’s the demarcation line drawn out on the map using green ink in 1949, separating Israeli and Arab lands. Jerusalem is probably the most religious city in the world and therefore also the most divided. However, because the hotel is owned by a mixture of Americans, Brits and Swedes, it is seen as ‘neutral’. A place where Arabs, Israelis and anyone else can happily meet over afternoon tea. A little oasis of civilisation in a turbulent land!Courtyard at the American Colony Hotel, Jerusalem

History

Our correspondent reports that it was originally built in the late 1800s by a high ranking Ottoman noble man, for himself and his four wives. What a guy, four wives and still got time to build stuff!
In 1895 it was used by a Christian family from Chicago who travelled to Palestine in order to find peace in the Holy city and to offer aid to families in distress.  By 1902, however, under Baron Ustinov (grandfather of, actor, Sir Peter Ustinov), it became the American Colony Hotel we see today.

Internal view of the American Colony Hotel, Jerusalem

The downside of living abroad

We suspect that the scones were not the primary reason for our correspondent’s visit … the hotel also has the best English bookshop in the region. However, he did have what he referred to as “A substantial afternoon tea served with an array of fresh sandwiches and then the scones some with and some without berries. Let us not forget the real cream and strawberries.” A scone at the American Colony Hotel, JerusalemThis, “adventure into nostalgia” was to be his first scone in over a year … the downside of living abroad.  But were they any good? Yes, topscones in his book. He also thought his Irish granny would have said “Lovely scones son, but will you ever get your hair cut?” If they’re good enough for his granny that’s good enough for us. Well done the American Colony Hotel.

Meddling

The great and the good have all stayed here … from Lawrence of Arabia to Bob Dylan. And if anyone is wondering where Tony Blair, disappeared to after the disastrous Iraq War then you need have looked no further than the first floor of this hotel. In a moment of madness, someone somewhere saw fit to appoint him peace envoy to the Middle East! He took the entire floor of the hotel for five years before eventually giving up. Now he runs the Tony Blair Institute for Global Change. And, of course, that allows him to meddle pointlessly in everybody’s politics.Logo of American Colony Hotel

Many thanks to our Middle East correspondent. We are relieved and happy that he has ended his year-long scone fast.

97200, Israel        tel: +972 2-627-9777         American Colony

///vowing.fairy.burns

Scones, Top

One Devonshire Gardens

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Readers might think that we are getting a wee bit highfalutin coming to places like this. We can only say, however, that it is all done on your behalf, in the name of sconological research.  After the John Forrest Bakery experience in Chelsea, where we ended up eating our scones outdoors in a kiddies playpark, it is only reasonable that we explore the other end of the scone spectrum. Isn’t it? Internal view of Hotel du Vin at One Devonshire Gardens, GlasgowAnyway, this is One Devonshire Gardens, officially known by the rather natty little title, Hotel du Vin at One Devonshire Gardens … and  it is highfalutin. Does that mean topscones though? We know that’s the question on everyone’s lips.  Over the years No 2 and No 3 were added and more recently No 4, so now the hotel takes up the entire terrace.

Kneeling

It’s certainly the place to stay for A-list celebs when they are in Glasgow – from Justin Timberlake to Whitney Houston, you name them they have all stayed. And now we’re here!! We had decided to walk here from the station but had not bargained on the day being so hot. We were extremely glad of a cool sparkling glass of champagne to kick things off. Mind you, can’t remember the last time we were not extremely glad of a glass of champagne. A chandelier at Hotel du Vin at One Devonshire Gardens, Glasgow

As we sat there sipping and thinking how wonderful life was, we learned that Pat was sitting in George Clooney’s old seat and I was in Britney Spears‘, wow! No, we just made that up!Afternoon tea at Hotel du Vin at One Devonshire Gardens, Glasgow Our table was low, about coffee table height. It meant our delightful young waiter of mysterious eastern European origin and almost seven feet tall had to kneel  to explain everything we were getting with our afternoon tea.  It’s slightly odd when your waiter is on his knees but still looking down at you.

Suffice to say that we were starting with savoury on the top tier then working our way down to the cakes at the bottom. The scones, of course, had an entire tier to themselves, as is only right and proper. Back in 2001 when this place belonged to Gordon Ramsay, it had a Michelin star and was called Amaryllis. Well, Michelin star or not, we don’t think the scones would have been any better back then than they were today.

Mon dieu

We had a plain and an apricot and lemon scone each. They were exactly how we like them, warm, crunchy on the outside and light and fluffy in the middle. The only slight problem was getting the tops off the little jars of French, yes French strawberry jam … mon dieu! Everything was fab and, as might be expected in such a place, topscone. All in all it was a lovely relaxing afternoon. There were lots of pictures around the hotel illustrating some profound celebrity quotes. Pictures at Hotel du Vin at One Devonshire Gardens, GlasgowI am not permitted to comment on the one by Rudyard Kipling but the one on the right, by Susan Hill, has been okayed.

11 years

The SNP had their annual conference this week just down the road from One Devonshire. It is astounding that this party is now the second biggest by membership in the UK. It’s also been in power in Scotland for the past eleven years. All this without a single positive word being said about them in any of the media … incredible. Nicola Sturgeon delivered a closing speech which other party leaders could only dream of. One of unity, hope, and kindness. Social media was alive with people wanting to come and live in Scotland. Or even wanting Nicola to go and lead their country. So perhaps there is more than smoothness to some politicians, maybe some are genuinely genuine?

BREAKING NEWS:

Also to be seen was David Cameron, of ill-placed wind turbine fame (oh and leader of the Conservatives) and Roger Highfield of The Telegraph Princess Eugenie, is getting married as we speak and not wearing a veil … mon dieu again!

A picture at Hotel du Vin at One Devonshire Gardens, Glasgow
a large decadent picture in reception

G12 0UX       tel: 0141 378 0385        One Devonshire

ps: Our Middle East correspondent has been busy. On a visit to Petah Tikva (the name means Opening of Hope) about six miles north of Tel Aviv he discovered ten K6 telephone boxes on Haim Ozer street. Sign for Haim Ozer street in Petah Tikva, IsraelK6 telephone boxes on Haim Ozer street in Petah Tikva, Israel

He tested every one and found them all to be in perfect working order and all from either Falkirk, Kirkintilloch or Glasgow … .  manufacturers badges on K6 telephone boxes on Haim Ozer street in Petah Tikva, Israel

Correspondents

Another correspondent, the Laird, has also been in touch to give us a heads up on several new exciting scone opportunities … watch this space. The Pedant has helpfully corrected some of our regular faux pas. Our Trossachs correspondents have reported on an enjoyable but frustratingly sconeless visit to Romania. We feel truly blessed to have such a dedicated band of globetrotting correspondents. Thanks to all.