Tag Archives: Newens Original Maids of Honour

Newens, The Original Maids of Honour

Now, if anyone thinks there is anything such as a benign dictatorship, think again. You only have to look back to Henry VIII to see what can happen. While these desperados creat havoc and destroy people’s lives they also have sycophants fawning over them for fear of losing their own position … or even their heads. This innocent little tale of a scone from Newens, The Original Maids of Honour in Kew will help illustrate the point and educate those of you who are not already familiar with tarts.

We are in London for a combined wedding anniversary/house warming party … it was quite a bash! After everything had calmed down we thought we should take a couple of our granddaughters and educate them in the art of scone and tart appreciation. Internal view of Newens Original Maids of Honour, KewNewens was only a couple of short bus rides away but when the children related their adventure later, it was 750 buses.

High Tea
Cakes at Newens Original Maids of Honour, Kew
If Henry VIII had walked in it would definitely have been “off with their heads”

First impressions are very definitely of a genteel quintessentially English tearoom. A sort of hang out for blue rinse ladies and probably not the best sort of environment for a pair of scallywags. We ordered ‘high tea’ for two at £18 per person. It turned out to be more like what we would call ‘afternoon tea’ at home. We are in the madness they call London so perhaps such things are to be expected. More than that they also had ‘The Special Taster Set Tea‘  at £35 per person, the Champagne Set Tea, the Prosecco Set Tea, the Savoury Set Tea as well as the Maids of Honour Afternoon Tea. Gosh, we may have to go back! So what is all this Maids of Honour stuff anyway?

HR departments

For that we have to return to Henry VIII. Apparently when he was married to Anne Boleyn he walked in one day to find Anne and her maids of honour tucking in to some little tarts that one of the maids had baked. He tasted one and found it so delicious he decided they should be made exclusively for him. So instead of chopping Anne’s head off right away and promoting the maid to wife … or even Queen, he imprisoned the maid so that she could bake tarts just for him. The recipe was locked away in an iron box in Richmond Palace. Anne’s head would have to wait a while until it could be detached. Heads of HR departments all over the world may be squirming at the moment however Henry would doubtless have topped them as well.

Choosing cakes at Newens Original Maids of Honour, Kew
difficult choices
Eclair truffle and tart

One of the features of our High Tea was that you had to go next door to the bakery shop and pick your preferred cake. One of our young granddaughters chose a chocolate eclair and the other a chocolate truffle. I of course had to have the Maids of Honour tart. Before all that, of course, there was the sandwiches and scones. All washed down with as much tea as you could drink. As expected, it was all very good. The scones were deliciously soft, not crunchy like we usually prefer but somehow they were still good enough for our top award.

And what of the Maids of Honour tarts? Well, obviously the recipe has escaped from its strongbox in the Palace and somehow found its way to Newens. We hope we are not putting ourselves at risk by disclosing it here though Newens still keep their recipe secret. They are delectable little crisp puff pastry wonders with a filling of squidgy cheese and lemon curd. Fan-dabby-dozy … we could easily understand why Henry got a bit carried away!Old staff photo at Newens Original Maids of Honour, Kew

COP26

We wonder what Henry VIII would make of the COP26 summit starting today in Glasgow. It stands for the 26th United Nations Climate Change Conference of the Parties and will see over 400 private jets flying in as well as all all the other flights. They will produce more climate warming gas than the whole of Scotland in a year. Not an auspicious start. Well known climate sceptic Boris, or should it be Borax, will be there blabbering away pretending to be a dyed in the wool greenie. Over 190 countries will be represented though not the host country. Scotland not invited … ask Borax! With all the disruption it’s causing they better come up with something worthwhile but it may take Henry with his great big axe to concentrate minds!

TW9 3DU     tel: 020 8940 2752    Newens Bakery

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